Gotdatmoney
Member
Don't shit where you eat is the general rule.
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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
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Don't shit where you eat is the general rule.
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
Fine, fine, I won't do it. I'll make do with what I have; better to get a limited pool of people who are ok with who I am than to pretend I'm someone I'm not.
I think that's the best approach. But, you need to maximize 'who you are' in the profile. If you're funny guy, make people laugh with what you write.
The girl from Hong Kong I went out on 2 dates with is now ghosting me.
It's bizarre since she messaged me straight after our last date saying how much fun she had, but she's gone silent. I have a feeling she might've thought I was stalking her on Facebook since she popped up on my suggested friends when I updated Messenger (along with a bunch of other girls I've dated...), but hopefully that's not the case.
I've also been seeing the New Zealand girl quite a bit, but she's away in Russia with her mum for a couple of weeks. For me it's purely casual since she's not here for long, but on the last date she muttered about where we're going whilst half asleep/drunk in bed. Since we didn't chat about it I'll likely talk with her on the next date.
Tonight I have a 2nd date with a girl I saw just before I went to Italy, so we'll see how that goes. We're going to an art gallery followed by some drinks, so it should be fun!
It's bizarre since she messaged me straight after our last date saying how much fun she had, but she's gone silent. I have a feeling she might've thought I was stalking her on Facebook since she popped up on my suggested friends when I updated Messenger (along with a bunch of other girls I've dated...), but hopefully that's not the case.
I've also been seeing the New Zealand girl quite a bit, but she's away in Russia with her mum for a couple of weeks. For me it's purely casual since she's not here for long, but on the last date she muttered about where we're going whilst half asleep/drunk in bed. Since we didn't chat about it I'll likely talk with her on the next date.
Tonight I have a 2nd date with a girl I saw just before I went to Italy, so we'll see how that goes. We're going to an art gallery followed by some drinks, so it should be fun!
Well no, it's not because you did those things, but generally it's better to do things... that you want to do...
I fail to believe that video games are the ONLY THING in your life that you do. And this is coming from me, a person that play like 20-25 hours of video games a week on average. And then spent way too many hours on GAF to round it out.
Just like look at event on Facebook or Meetup in your area. If it interests you, go to it and take pictures while you're there. You don't have to force yourself to go hiking or something if that isn't your thing.
Yep! Ys and the company's other series. That music is fantastic.
Chrono Trigger is great too though. I wish Square would put their OSTs on Spotify
Who wouldn't want to get a picture with an adorable baby animal
Your date is just like you, and she's probably nervous too. Don't worry about it too much and go with the flow!
JadedWriter
Member
Cause if enough people start doing it it starts to look like a cliched dating site gimmick fad.
I have tried this on four or five different occasions, they have bombed spectacularly, I don't do it anymore.
always crazy bacon
Banned
always crazy bacon
Banned
So many lion cubs, enough for everyone to run it into the ground.
Gotdatmoney
Member
Taking a picture with a lion is never cliche or a gimmick. If you got to play with a baby lion you trying to tell me you wouldn't take a picture?
Its just always a bad idea. Even when it works out it's a bad idea.
JadedWriter
Member
I have learned this the hard way. I have been warned about it, but some dumb motherfuckers can only learn by putting their hand on the stove...repeatedly.
So just sharing.
A few months ago a girl I was acquainted with (friend of a friend, saw hew a few times in the last few years, didn't speak much together outside our group) jokingly ask if I would mind being her sex friend, I said "why not" and it does ended up being serious lol, I didn't have that kind of experience and I'm the kind of guy that tries a lot of things so I went for it.
So I went to her place for the week-end and we were both a bit nervous, I won't get into details but you know how that goes for a guy when he is, still ended up being satisfying for both of us in the end we then met our common friends to eat that night and went out to the rink the following day, I was being nice (well I was just acting like I always do which is apparently nicer than most expect) discussing various topics and all, so it was going well maybe a bit awkward but still ok overall also spent a good part of the day with our common friends and I then left.
A few weeks later said friends were coming near my city to spend the week-end, I asked her beforehand if she wanted to tag along and say "sure", week-end was pretty nice I still had my problems in bed (
) but it was still going fine so we talked about meeting once again.
I think it's worth mentioning than when with our friends she was jokingly belittling me in front of others, it was maybe fun the first time but a bit annoying for everyone after (I'm not the kind of guy who gets angry over such things, so I just kept quiet instead of reacting, the others were doing the same), we also did an escape game where we had to split into two teams and she willfully avoid being in the same team as me.
Then I proceeded to take a longass time to answer her which is a terrible thing to do, not ghosting but taking days or even weeks, in fact two weeks and 3 beers before I finally answered her (yeah I'm ashamed ), where I just said I needed to check trains table and prices before coming a week-end in June.
She then talked to me a bit more and I didn't reply the following days (man this is depressing to write as it's disrespectful as fuck), and she finally sent me a SMS a few days after telling me she ended up "beginning to like me" and it was disturbing for her and she preferred we stopped sleeping together for "her mental health"
I answered the following day saying honestly than I was pretty surprised, completely accepted her choice, apologized because of how she was distressed because of me, and also than I was instead thinking that me taking a long ass time to answer was annoying for her.
So I guess even without willfully doing so and even though she was not looking for it, I did ended up doing the "right things" when we saw each other, but it ended up doing more bad than good for her, the long ass wait for replies probably looked like teasing for her but I sure didn't intended it to be like that.
Notes : I'm going to live abroad for one year, so a relationship was not something I was looking for at this point (I also told hear pretty early), I don't think I had any special feeling for her at this point too.
A few months ago a girl I was acquainted with (friend of a friend, saw hew a few times in the last few years, didn't speak much together outside our group) jokingly ask if I would mind being her sex friend, I said "why not" and it does ended up being serious lol, I didn't have that kind of experience and I'm the kind of guy that tries a lot of things so I went for it.
So I went to her place for the week-end and we were both a bit nervous, I won't get into details but you know how that goes for a guy when he is, still ended up being satisfying for both of us in the end we then met our common friends to eat that night and went out to the rink the following day, I was being nice (well I was just acting like I always do which is apparently nicer than most expect) discussing various topics and all, so it was going well maybe a bit awkward but still ok overall also spent a good part of the day with our common friends and I then left.
A few weeks later said friends were coming near my city to spend the week-end, I asked her beforehand if she wanted to tag along and say "sure", week-end was pretty nice I still had my problems in bed (
which had both to do with being nervous , being dead tired doing too much sports and a bit of anemia as I learned much later
I think it's worth mentioning than when with our friends she was jokingly belittling me in front of others, it was maybe fun the first time but a bit annoying for everyone after (I'm not the kind of guy who gets angry over such things, so I just kept quiet instead of reacting, the others were doing the same), we also did an escape game where we had to split into two teams and she willfully avoid being in the same team as me.
Then I proceeded to take a longass time to answer her which is a terrible thing to do, not ghosting but taking days or even weeks, in fact two weeks and 3 beers before I finally answered her (yeah I'm ashamed
), where I just said I needed to check trains table and prices before coming a week-end in June.She then talked to me a bit more and I didn't reply the following days (man this is depressing to write as it's disrespectful as fuck), and she finally sent me a SMS a few days after telling me she ended up "beginning to like me" and it was disturbing for her and she preferred we stopped sleeping together for "her mental health"
I answered the following day saying honestly than I was pretty surprised, completely accepted her choice, apologized because of how she was distressed because of me, and also than I was instead thinking that me taking a long ass time to answer was annoying for her.
So I guess even without willfully doing so and even though she was not looking for it, I did ended up doing the "right things" when we saw each other, but it ended up doing more bad than good for her, the long ass wait for replies probably looked like teasing for her but I sure didn't intended it to be like that.
Notes : I'm going to live abroad for one year, so a relationship was not something I was looking for at this point (I also told hear pretty early), I don't think I had any special feeling for her at this point too.
fuck the bandwagon, I want a picture with a baby lion
A turtle would work too
Actually I could probably find a turtle if I tried
I want a baby lion too! Omg.
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
I mean, not ONLY, but... generally the last 6/7 years (since I got a job) my routine Monday to Friday is get home from work, eat, watch something (anime, netflix, let's play) then play games until bedtime (about 4-5 hours a day I'd guess). On weekends unless I have errands or something I want to go into town for it'll be ~6 hours of games a day.
Occasionally I'll go out for drinks with people from work on a Friday. Every couple of months I might go cross country to visit family (for birthdays or such). I used to go to an airgun club once a week for a couple of years, but that stopped after I moved. I have over 1000 hours in GTA Online logged since its release, that's probably what I've played most the last few years.
You know what? I don't care if it might be a little deceitful...any reason to get you to expand your horizons a little will be a good one. So go, do adventurous shit that'll look good on an online dating profile! You might just find that there're better things to spend all your time on than video games.
Don't try to be something you're not. That regards finances as well.
jimmypython
Member
Apparently if someone visits your page, you might show up on their 'people you might know' list. So OP is either a stalker and thinks he got caught because of this, or the girl is the stalker hence showing up on his list.
Unfortunately it is not the most flattering pic and unsuitable as a dating site pic. So, let this be a lesson: if you ride an ostrich, make sure you get a good picture taken.
I have a picture of me riding an ostrich.
Unfortunately it is not the most flattering pic and unsuitable as a dating site pic. So, let this be a lesson: if you ride an ostrich, make sure you get a good picture taken.
Gotdatmoney
Member
These are the plenty of hobbies you were speaking of?
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
It's like people don't realize the table test.
I mean, play games a little less and learn how to cook a few recipes. Join one club. Make an effort to go out once a weekend, somewhere.
Like, that's the bare minimum of effort - but it's honestly enough to exponentially increase attractiveness.
JadedWriter
Member
I think I'm probably a little more interesting now since I got into photography. It has less of an air of basement dweller compared to "I watch anime and play games all day."
"I like to learn new recipes" on a guy's profile is probably an attraction multiplier.
Gotdatmoney
Member
I'm not here to shit on how anyone wants to spend their free time and we are on gaf so I can assume all of us have at least a passing interest in gaming. But jesus, plain and simple if you are a guy and you want a girlfriend and are struggling then you have to aspire to do more than play video games and watch anime.
Like flatout, you need to expand your interests and expand your tastes. If you don't want to then enjoy being lonely because the odds are you will not find someone okay with yoy spending all your time doing that.
Is this harsh? Yeah. Do I care? Nope because it's true. Play a sport, read a book, hike, go to a wine tasting, enjoy a festival, learn to bake, go bowling. Jesus christ do something. Take interest in something.
I am not the worlds most interesting person. I have several hundreds of hours poured into games. But like I still try to take interest in doing new things or varying up the routine. I go to sporting events, try to hang out with friends in different cities, go to bars or pubs, go to the gym, play sports, go on a hike, see a movie. Something ya know?
If all you have to offer is gaming, I really pray you find someone also like that because most people arent gonna aceept that.
Photography is a great hobby and a good way to get you out and about exploring new places.
JadedWriter
Member
It helps, though I have to learn how to incorporate that hobby better...if at all to be honest. Was going to bring my camera on my date, but I really don't think I want to haul around a distraction bag when I'm trying to focus on getting to know a person.
timetokill
Banned
That's true, but on the other hand I have to balance that out with branching out a bit and expanding myself as a person. Obviously I can't spend like I make twice what I do, and if that is a dealbreaker then it is what it is, but on the other hand I could probably stand to buy a nicer set of clothes or two and maybe spend less on videogames. If I need to bring my lunch to work a few times a week so I can afford an extra date, then it's worth it (and probably healthier as well). Just need to shift priorities on a couple things.
Gotdatmoney
Member
I mean, I got an old friend who does photography and it mostly looks like he just goes places and shoots photos. Or if he is on a trip he brings his camera and gets cool shots. Try that maybe.
JadedWriter
Member
I picked up the hobby while I was dating my ex and I think she got jealous about it. I go around and take pictures enough, I'm not exactly sure if I want to start doing it while I'm trying to date some one currently. My problem last time around I think was balance. No girl: Photography. With girl: Leave camera at home. Now if we're going some place really interesting I think I'll just bring it.
artsi
Member
Facebook gets your WhatsApp contact list and suggests people based on that. At least I've had that happen.
The thing is, even girls who are heavily into videogames/anime will prefer guys who are more than JUST into those two hobbies.
All else being equal, of course the guy who likes games/anime but ALSO hiking/cooking/playing an instrument/museums/concerts/ photography/archery/reading/ dancing/volunteering/whatever is going to be more appealing as a well-rounded person.
LordGorchnik
Member
Some good advice these last page of posts. You have to aspire to do more. It's amazing that most people find they are hooked on new things once they try them.
As I got older I took a huge interest in cooking/baking/grilling. Let me tell you something, a guy that can cook is (almost always) a huge attraction multiplier.
Also took up oil-painting and pencil sketching. Never had so much fun drawing in my entire life.
Also, if you take 1/2 your game allowance and put it towards something else you will find you manage your hobbies better. Thus $60/month on one new game becomes $30/mo for a new game once every two months. That other $30 can go towards a nice set of clothes, shoes, art supplies, film, weights for working out, whatever.
Apply yourself!
As I got older I took a huge interest in cooking/baking/grilling. Let me tell you something, a guy that can cook is (almost always) a huge attraction multiplier.
Also took up oil-painting and pencil sketching. Never had so much fun drawing in my entire life.
Also, if you take 1/2 your game allowance and put it towards something else you will find you manage your hobbies better. Thus $60/month on one new game becomes $30/mo for a new game once every two months. That other $30 can go towards a nice set of clothes, shoes, art supplies, film, weights for working out, whatever.
Apply yourself!
True Savior
Member
Meeting a psychopath? Serial killer? Or just another person?
right now I'm being nervous because my date is browsing okcupid...
Sleep is for the weak!
Even though most of my time is spent at home, my "hobbies" since everyone is talking:
-trail walking/hiking/jogging
-baking
-drawing/art/animation
-reading
-bras (lol)
-tea
-movies/TV
-would love to travel way way more
Pretty boring haha.
Stop social media stalking your date. Problem solved!
But how will I overanalyze and second-guess every single little insignificant thing she does then?!
You are browsing okcupid
Something physical is definitely a good choice if you're looking to pick something up: hiking, biking, yoga, running, really anything.
Dude... stop.
Moose Biscuits
It would be extreamly painful...
Wow, a lot of replies. You guys are right, I need to get a hobby besides videogames. I mean (damage control incoming) I already do cook, and I did used to bake though I haven't done so in years. I don't know if I would class them as hobbies for me personally though, I just cook because I like to eat. I did used to draw but I stopped before I got my current job, I wasn't happy with my skill level but didn't want to put the effort in to improve.
Sorry for my bad attitude in this thread.
Sorry for my bad attitude in this thread.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
One of the girls I'm seeing, date 2 was cooking at my place. (This is EXACTLY why you learn some recipes.) We hooked up before cooking. Date 3 is walking in a park.
Another first date, tonight, in a bookstore/bar with one of my many, apparently, cute Jewish girls.
Want an easy way to find them? Just say yes to whatever your friends are doing, no matter what. This is why I now regularly attend EDM shows and might be going to Brazil this NYE.
ZackieChan
Member
Girl I went out with texts me a lot. I need to set some boundaries. Going out to movie and karaoke tomorrow. She wants to cook for me, as well (and I her), so there's a good excuse for her to come over. She lives with her parents, so my place it is!
JadedWriter
Member
Seems like I made a big deal over nothing with the "team introvert" comment. Date's still on and she never even commented on it. I guess it was her being an introvert.
always crazy bacon
Banned
We've heard this story in this topic before. Sure your not retconning the past and finally getting that cute girl from HS instead of actually having an interest in her. What she represents no who she is?
always crazy bacon
Banned
Or you know, it just wasn't funny?
JadedWriter
Member
I actually expected her to be mad in some form, it being funny or not was the least of my worries.
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