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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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G

Gotdatmoney

Member
Peltz said:
Is it bad that I once told a girl to fuck off because she was 45 minutes late and didn't look anything like her photos?

She literally popped her head into the bar, came over to me and said "Hi I'm ____."

And I, being already drunk and mad replied, "Fuck off". I mean... I escalated that shit quickly, but she kinda deserved it?
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You're a hero man.

Big Blue said:
In my opinion, if you never end meeting up with a guy/girl than ghosting is well within reason. However, if some takes you out on date, pays, makes plans, etc. then I think it's wrong to leave someone hanging just because you don't have the courage (let's be honest, this is probably the #1 reason for ghosting) to tell someone you don't want to see them anymore is cowardly IMO. That goes doubly for guys.
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Getting your bravery stat to +10 doesn't fucking matter to anyone. Real talk.

gaiages said:
I had to block one guy one time. I was waiting for the bus one day and this fucker would not just leave me alone, so I eventually give him my number. Before anyone asks, yes, jerk offs like this actually check the number on the spot to make sure they're real. This motherfucker would NOT stop texting me, so I just blocked him... but apparently I only blocked the texts and this cunt monger called me in the middle of work one day, and I picked up because I was applying for new jobs at the time so numbers I didn't recognize wasn't a huge flag.

He was all like "why don't you answer my texts" and "we need to go out drinking" and blah blah blah so I hung up and blocked him from calling me, too.

What an ass.

At the same time though, I tend to get hit on by mostly men that see me and think I have low self esteem, aka an easy target so most randos aren't very polite. They just usually give up when I don't respond or mention my SO tho, so I don't have to block them.
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Man fuck this guy. This is some weak ass shit. Not only is it pathetic. It's down right obsessive.

Don't forget Jim and Pam making a whole slew of people think that office romances are just a fantastic idea :|
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Worst.

gaiages said:
You'll get that engaged Italian girl money, I believe in you.

Then you'll be happy you lost that phone!
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This is the end game in my life plan.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
Gotdatmoney said:
You're a hero man.



Getting your bravery stat to +10 doesn't fucking matter to anyone. Real talk.



Man fuck this guy. This is some weak ass shit. Not only is it pathetic. It's down right obsessive.



Worst.



This is the end game in my life plan.
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Just calling it like it is. People in here crying that they don't owe them anything, when they're just to bitch made to tell someone the truth. Man the fuck up.
 
G

gaiages

Banned
Big Blue said:
In my opinion, if you never end meeting up with a guy/girl than ghosting is well within reason. However, if some takes you out on date, pays, makes plans, etc. then I think it's wrong to leave someone hanging just because you don't have the courage (let's be honest, this is probably the #1 reason for ghosting) to tell someone you don't want to see them anymore is cowardly IMO. That goes doubly for guys.
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Yeah yeah we're all cowards blah blah blah

I'm guessing you were one of the ones that read that other thread and decided to ignore all the posts about men and women alike having someone go nuclear because you were "brave" enough to reject them, huh?
 
B

Big Blue

Member
gaiages said:
Yeah yeah we're all cowards blah blah blah

I'm guessing you were one of the ones that read that other thread and decided to ignore all the posts about men and women alike having someone go nuclear because you were "brave" enough to reject them, huh?
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That's just confirmation bias, I have no doubt in my mind the opposite has occurred much more. We just don't make posts about it. I have 100% ghosted women on Tinder, OKC etc. But if they actually take the time to hang out with me, I have no problem telling the truth. I have yet have someone go "nuclear"
 
G

gaiages

Banned
Big Blue said:
That's just confirmation bias, I have no doubt in my mind the opposite has occurred much more. We just don't make posts about it. I have 100% ghosted women on Tinder, OKC etc. But if they actually take the time to hang out with me, I have no problem telling the truth. I have yet have someone go "nuclear"
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Congrats! You are both 1, a man who does not have to fear for their safety and 2, using anecdotal evidence as fact.

I highly suggest you don't keep trying to argue your point here, go look at some studies or something and educate yourself on the matter of safety in terms of dating.
 
L

Leeness

Member
Until that dude gets my number or my Facebook or something, I wouldn't want to take any action against him. At this point, it's just harmless and I roll my eyes and block him again. If he found me on FB, texted me or something, then I'd be concerned.

Gaiages, sorry for the texting/phoning creeper.

Oxn said:
Maybe youre too hot?
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Absolutely not lol.
 
G

Gotdatmoney

Member
Big Blue said:
Just calling it like it is. People in here crying that they don't owe them anything, when they're just to bitch made to tell someone the truth. Man the fuck up.
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I'm also calling it like it is. You take it as a slight. Like you matter enough that this person cares about you or your idea of courage or cowardice. Bruh, they don't. They don't care that you're feelings are hurt. I certainly don't give a fuck if some girl I ghosted feels some type of way. It's really that simple. No one cares.

We're bitch made. We're cowards. Okay cool. Shout it from the rooftops fam. Maybe I'll be in your city, hear it and remember this convo. Prob not though.
 
P

Pattycakes

Banned
gaiages said:
Congrats! You are both 1, a man who does not have to fear for their safety and 2, using anecdotal evidence as fact.

I highly suggest you don't keep trying to argue your point here, go look at some studies or something and educate yourself on the matter of safety in terms of dating.
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Ding ding ding! We have a winner!

Big Blue you are not coming across well here.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
Pattycakes said:
That's nice that you think so. I'm sure the guys in this thread will remember that Big Blue thinks they are a pussy the next time they ghost someone.
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No, they'll be thinking, I'm too scared to send this girl a quick text to end things, so I'll just not respond. Like a pussy would.
 
L

LucidMomentum

Member
Big Blue said:
No, they'll be thinking, I'm too scared to send this girl a quick text to end things, so I'll just not respond. Like a pussy would.
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Look, pal. You continue to use the word pussy in here like it's an insult, in a thread where a lot of women are giving advice. Not a great look.

Maybe you shouldn't be storming in all macho man trying to make a point that people who ghost are afraid of the possible blowback of turning someone down.

Because you're right. We all know that's why people ghost.

But the thing is, it's people like you getting mad about it and people like Leeeness' stalker proving that there's still reasons why people ghost.

Don't know what you're trying to prove here mate. Don't take it personally if someone ghosts you. Society has kind of made it a viable way to handle things, because there are too many assholes and too many creepy people out there, especially for women.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
LucidMomentum said:
Look, pal. You continue to use the word pussy in here like it's an insult, in a thread where a lot of women are giving advice. Not a great look.

Maybe you shouldn't be storming in all macho man trying to make a point that people who ghost are afraid of the possible blowback of turning someone down.

Because you're right. We all know that's why people ghost.

But the thing is, it's people like you getting mad about it and people like Leeeness' stalker proving that there's still reasons why people ghost.

Don't know what you're trying to prove here mate. Don't take it personally if someone ghosts you. Society has kind of made it a viable way to handle things, because there are too many assholes and too many creepy people out there, especially for women.
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You're right, and apologize to the women in here for using that. With that said, I specifically called out men for it, and my point stands.
 
P

Pattycakes

Banned
Big Blue said:
You're right, and apologize to the women in here for using that. With that said, I specifically called out men for it, and my point stands.
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Today, we all learned something about Big Blue. He's been ghosted by people on Grindr before, and it hurt his feeling. A lot. Why else would he care about men ghosting so much if he wasn't ghosted by a man? Surely he doesn't need to fight for women who say ghosting is okay.
 
L

LookAtMeGo

Member
When I ran away from that girl at the bar I did kinda feel like an ass. I felt kinda shallow but it was kinda bullshit. I did eventually go back in and talk to her though. I dont think I've ever ghosted anyone.

Well on a date. I have ignored texts tho.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
Pattycakes said:
Today, we all learned something about Big Blue. He's been ghosted by people on Grindr before, and it hurt his feeling. A lot. Why else would he care about men ghosting so much if he wasn't ghosted by a man? Surely he doesn't need to fight for women who say ghosting is okay.
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Even if it were Grindr, what's the point of this homophobic post???
 
Mediking

Mediking

Member
Advocatus Diaboli said:
whynotboth.gif

I absolutely don't advocate engaging (and learning) about sex with someone you don't feel comfortable with and care about. Ideally, you'd have great communication with your partner, which would enable you to talk about what you like. You'd both be encouraging, forgiving, and patient. And, all the after-care stuff we've mentioned -- cuddling, etc. -- that's fantastic too.

Basically, I agree with you more than you think. I had a terrible first time (basically: I didn't really want to and she pressured me) and it wrecked me for a while. I didn't even truly enjoy it with my ex-wife, though it was probably more me than her. It wasn't until this year that I finally felt comfortable and confident: the sex I'm having with my current girl is fantastic, and even the girl I hooked up with the weekend before last, it was pretty damn awesome too.

Lower your expectations, not your standards.

Find someone you're comfortable with and someone who'll be comfortable with you making rookie mistakes.

You don't learn how to be a better lover/partner by imitating movies. It really does take reps: setbacks, failures, mistakes. But it's imperative you find someone it's okay to "fail" with.
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Thanks for telling me this. You and everybody else really opened my eyes. I got an idea.
 
R

Ralemont

not me
Pattycakes said:
Surely he doesn't need to fight for women who say ghosting is okay.
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Some women say ghosting is okay, and most of those still admit it's shitty behavior meant to counter even shittier behavior.

If someone wants to protect themselves from the possibility of blowback by ignoring someone who seems genuinely excited to see them again, then while understandable it does make you kind of an ass.
 
P

Pattycakes

Banned
Big Blue said:
Even if it were Grindr, what's the point of this homophobic post???
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There's nothing wrong with Grindr. There's nothing wrong with being gay or lesbian. That being said, you strike me as someone with your macho man attitude that struggles with being secure in their masculinity and avoid such things.

I'm pointing out you care an awful fucking lot about men ghosting when you aren't on the receiving end of men ghosting, and women don't need you to stand up for them and tell other men to stop ghosting.
 
L

LookAtMeGo

Member
The times I have been stood up I did get really angry. Mostly for wasting my time. But I never really did take into consideration why it might happen before. I think its mostly a pride thing. And I do think there are situations where yeah, its uncalled for. But after actually hearing it from a girls perspective, it really doesnt seem that big a deal. I'll still prolly get angry if it happens again. I just wont dwell on it too much.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
Pattycakes said:
There's nothing wrong with Grindr. There's nothing wrong with being gay or lesbian. That being said, you strike me as someone with your macho man attitude that struggles with being secure in their masculinity and avoid such things.

I'm pointing out you care an awful fucking lot about men ghosting when you aren't on the receiving end of men ghosting, and women don't need you to stand up for them and tell other men to stop ghosting.
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I'm straight, and even I were gay, I'd be secure with my masculinity regardless. They don't need me too. There is a lot of media, social media, etc. where they do it themselves. Shit my little sister got ghosted, and the lack of closure really sucked for her. My real point is if you're a man, admit that it's shitty, and admit you do it because it's easier than being upfront to someone. Don't make an excuse for it.
 
D

dreamcastmaster

Banned
Big Blue said:
I'm straight, and even I were gay, I'd be secure with my masculinity regardless. They don't need me too. There is a lot of media, social media, etc. where they do it themselves. Shit my little sister got ghosted, and the lack of closure really sucked for her. My real point is if you're a man, admit that it's shitty, and admit you do it because it's easier than being upfront to someone. Don't make an excuse for it.
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He's single isnt he? Don't miss out ladies!
 
P

Pattycakes

Banned
Mediking said:
Thanks for telling me this. You and everybody else really opened my eyes. I got an idea.
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C'mon you can't just tease us like that. Tell us the idea.

dreamcastmaster said:
He's single isnt he? Don't miss out ladies!
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I'm pretty sure he expected everyone to agree with him.

"Wow Big Blue you are exactly right! I can't believe I never stopped and realized other guys who ghosted are pussies!"

"I can't believe I never realized I'm a pussy"

"Omg Big Blue you're so like smart and strong and macho, will you like go out with me?"

Big Blue said:
Nope :)
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I feel sorry for your SO
 
I

Incendiary

Banned
I always check in on this thread at the weirdest times.

The only time I ever ghosted somebody was a girl I'd already said no to, who tried to be friends with me after I said no but was obviously still trying to make it more than friends because she blatantly hit on me even when I said no and was dating somebody else. So I deleted her from Facebook and stopped replying to her texts.

But obviously I'm a pussy because I didn't tell her no a fifteenth time.
 
P

Pattycakes

Banned
Gotdatmoney said:
We don't need to hit below the belt. This isn't necessary.
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I mean if he legitimately acts like this in the real word, using a female word to shame and demean other men, I'm sure he's great in person
/s

I would legitimately feel sorry for someone who gets stuck with him and doesn't realize what he is like online.
 
B

Big Blue

Member
Pattycakes said:
I mean if he legitimately acts like this in the real word, using a female word to shame and demean other men, I'm sure he's great in person
/s

I would legitimately feel sorry for someone who gets stuck with him and doesn't realize what he is like online.
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I'd rather be that than someone who attempted to shame me because they thought I was gay.
 
P

Peltz

Member
Big Blue said:
Just calling it like it is. People in here crying that they don't owe them anything, when they're just to bitch made to tell someone the truth. Man the fuck up.
Click to expand...

I've never ghosted anyone. And I've been ghosted PLENTY.

And I still maintain that nobody owes any explanations to a stranger. Manning the fuck up means accepting rejection with dignity and moving on.
 
A

Advocatus Diaboli

Member
Pattycakes said:
I mean if he legitimately acts like this in the real word, using a female word to shame and demean other men, I'm sure he's great in person
/s

I would legitimately feel sorry for someone who gets stuck with him and doesn't realize what he is like online.
Click to expand...

Big Blue said:
I'd rather be that than someone who attempted to shame me because they thought I was gay.
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Let's not.

Mediking said:
Thanks for telling me this. You and everybody else really opened my eyes. I got an idea.
Click to expand...

What idea is that?
 
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