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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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N

NotTheGuyYouKill

Member
She hasn't messaged me since our blowout on Tuesday, but yesterday, she posted a picture of the plush I got her for her birthday with a comment about how it's her best friend with two Spongebob related hashtags, but also #imready

I'm reading way too much into this, right??

And no, I didn't go seeking it out, it was in my feed. My female friend says this is a tactic girls use to throw guys awry, so that I'm thinking "Oh, she's thinking about me, we should totally get back together!"

But I haven't messaged her, and I won't. The more time since the blowout, the more I think... as much as I really like her, I'm not sure a relationship with us would be able to tackle her own issues.

I can't stand when she compares me to her past boyfriends (even if she says she's kidding and apologizes), when she says something feels missing, when she doesn't wanna define what we are, it's all too disconcerting for me.

But I really like her. I feel like I can't be rational and objective, so I've been sharing my whole situation with three of my best friends, and they've been giving me reality checks since Tuesday and they all agree that it doesn't seem like wahtever's going on is fully on the rails.
 
A

Ashby

Member
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
She hasn't messaged me since our blowout on Tuesday, but yesterday, she posted a picture of the plush I got her for her birthday with a comment about how it's her best friend with two Spongebob related hashtags, but also #imready

I'm reading way too much into this, right??

And no, I didn't go seeking it out, it was in my feed. My female friend says this is a tactic girls use to throw guys awry, so that I'm thinking "Oh, she's thinking about me, we should totally get back together!"

But I haven't messaged her, and I won't. The more time since the blowout, the more I think... as much as I really like her, I'm not sure a relationship with us would be able to tackle her own issues.

I can't stand when she compares me to her past boyfriends (even if she says she's kidding and apologizes), when she says something feels missing, when she doesn't wanna define what we are, it's all too disconcerting for me.

But I really like her. I feel like I can't be rational and objective, so I've been sharing my whole situation with three of my best friends, and they've been giving me reality checks since Tuesday and they all agree that it doesn't seem like wahtever's going on is fully on the rails.
Click to expand...
This is some 14 year old girl shit right here, man. Cut bait.
 
O

Oblivion

Fetishing muscular manly men in skintight hosery
I'm wondering if adding a dog to my profile pics would improve my chances of getting responses.

Thoughts?
 
L

loudbill

Member
Well, here is an update on my situation for those who care:
I cut her off. She threatened to cut her self, kill herself etc. if i cut her off. We shared "lewd" photos before i knew her real age. She threatened to disclose this information to the police if i "upset" her. My cousin helped me research the laws, and its fine that we shared the photos. Perfectly legal.
I was convinved that prison was an option for me. I panicked a little, and took it seriously. This girl was crazyyy, but obviously not educated on the law. I deleted my snapchat, and its over.

Im a little sad, but mainly sad for her. She needs serious help. Her life has been terrible. Very pretty girl, very cool besides her mental health. I was her first "boyfriend." I was surprised because she's literally a 10/10, but now i see why.
Thanks for all your advice, it was golden!

Edit: she was in love with me (or so she thought). She will definitely be depressed, but she crossed the line.
 
W

Will the Thrill

Banned
Oblivion said:
I'm wondering if adding a dog to my profile pics would improve my chances of getting responses.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...

Would you be with the dog in the pics or would it literally just be a single picture of the dog by itself?

I've had two pics with my dog in the frame with me and that's typically all I've needed for "Aww your dog is so cute" type responses. People have pictures of just their pets all the time from what I've seen on stuff though.
 
L

Llyranor

Member
Oblivion said:
I'm wondering if adding a dog to my profile pics would improve my chances of getting responses.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...

Wear your dog on your head like a hat. You will get tons of messages.

loudbill said:
Edit: she was in love with me (or so she thought). She will definitely be depressed, but she crossed the line.
Click to expand...

Glad the law is on your side if true. But she wasn't in love with you. She was emotionally blackmailing you with the suicide threats, and literally blackmailing you with the photo. This has manipulation and control all over it.

Anyway, remember these red flags and learn from the experience. And hopefully you've learned that looks and interests aren't everything. And maybe no lewd pics until you really know someone (if even then)
 
S

Scotch

Member
loudbill said:
Well, here is an update on my situation for those who care:
I cut her off. She threatened to cut her self, kill herself etc. if i cut her off. We shared "lewd" photos before i knew her real age. She threatened to disclose this information to the police if i "upset" her. My cousin helped me research the laws, and its fine that we shared the photos. Perfectly legal.
I was convinved that prison was an option for me. I panicked a little, and took it seriously. This girl was crazyyy, but obviously not educated on the law. I deleted my snapchat, and its over.

Im a little sad, but mainly sad for her. She needs serious help. Her life has been terrible. Very pretty girl, very cool besides her mental health. I was her first "boyfriend." I was surprised because she's literally a 10/10, but now i see why.
Thanks for all your advice, it was golden!

Edit: she was in love with me (or so she thought). She will definitely be depressed, but she crossed the line.
Click to expand...
And to think just yesterday you were madly in love with her!
 
O

Ogodei

Member
Will the Thrill said:
Would you be with the dog in the pics or would it literally just be a single picture of the dog by itself?

I've had two pics with my dog in the frame with me and that's typically all I've needed for "Aww your dog is so cute" type responses. People have pictures of just their pets all the time from what I've seen on stuff though.
Click to expand...

Dogs seem to work a good 20x better than cats though. Everything i see on Bumble is all "must love dogs," and the only time i saw cats referenced, it was negatively.

But i'm not going to budge on that one. I find dogs obnoxious in large doses.
 
A

Advocatus Diaboli

Member
Astral said:
The girl I'm dating won't tell me her age. She refuses to. Or what she does for a living for that matter. She says it doesn't matter. That when we're out she's there with me in the moment. It's really weird. I don't know if it's a cultural thing or something. She was born and raised in the Philippines and has only been here like 3 years. I think. She might be weird.
Click to expand...

Astral said:
Three weeks now and four dates. She says she's not necessarily looking for a relationship and is having fun. I am too so I guess this stuff isn't that much of a deal breaker. It's definitely odd though. She's so secretive about shit.

EDIT: Two weeks actually.
Click to expand...

Astral said:
She's not underage so thank fucking god for that. She's shown her idea at a bar. She tells me she's older than me. That's all I get out of her. I just don't wanna find out she's 10 years older than me. The job thing is suspicious. She has told me she was 3 jobs. One is online, another is a teacher that teaches something somewhere, and a mystery one. Or it could've just been those two. I believe she recently quit the teacher one and got a new job where she has to wear a handkerchief on her head as part of the uniform I think. But yeah she could be a 50 year old prostitute for all I know.
Click to expand...

So, have you met her husband and kids yet?

I was stationed in Okinawa for 2 years, and because divorce isn't legal in that country, it was kinda shocking how many Filipinas found Americans to sponsor their family members for immigration purposes.
 
N

NotTheGuyYouKill

Member
Astral said:
I feel like I'm missing an entire story arc here. Why did you guys fight in the first place? Was it really that bad? Sounds like you wanna talk to her.
Click to expand...

She wanted a break to work on herself, I got tired of her mixed messages and undermining my confidence and we had an argument over it and haven't talked in a few days. She apologized and said she wants a break but wants to make it work, but now I think that a romantic relationship between us won't work.

always crazy bacon said:
Just ignore it.
Click to expand...

I did respond with "I'm alright, how are you" but I'm gonna be very clear that nothing's gonna happen beyond just being friends

Responded a couple minutes before you posted :/
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I did respond with "I'm alright, how are you" but I'm gonna be very clear that nothing's gonna happen beyond just being friends

Responded a couple minutes before you posted :/
Click to expand...

Now she knows you'll jump every time she asks, don't get sucked into her drama vortex again. I would not even class this Ex as a friend in your situation.
 
G

GK86

Homeland Security Fail
I'm doing much better with OKC this time around. I have three dates lined up for this week. Assuming Mother Nature doesn't ruin shit with her snowstorm.
 
N

NotTheGuyYouKill

Member
always crazy bacon said:
Now she knows you'll jump every time she asks, don't get sucked into her drama vortex again. I would not even class this Ex as a friend in your situation.
Click to expand...

I responded over an hour after she messaged me. She messaged me again, but I won't respond for a while.

Should I just be straight with her and say it's not gonna work out? I don't wanna ghost.

But no, I can't allow myself to get sucked up in the drama again.
 
B

Black_Red

Member
I think I'm too frustrated to write to write the whole story. But I just hit an inflection point.
Me and a coworker liked the same girl (never talked about it, we just knew), he made a move on our farewell party and I didnt :( (We were both on an internship and we were leaving the same day).
I'm not going to let this happen to me again, so first I just re-started to work out to regain some confidence.

(Also, her farewell party is in 3 weeks and I dont even know if I can go )
 
A

Astral

Member
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I responded over an hour after she messaged me. She messaged me again, but I won't respond for a while.

Should I just be straight with her and say it's not gonna work out? I don't wanna ghost.

But no, I can't allow myself to get sucked up in the drama again.
Click to expand...

Tell her it's not gonna work out and say goodbye. Don't look back no matter how much she begs or cries. Don't think about her pain if she does. Trust me. I'm sure everyone will tell you the same. If you really wanna end it then make it happen. Ensure that it's over.
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
I responded over an hour after she messaged me. She messaged me again, but I won't respond for a while.

Should I just be straight with her and say it's not gonna work out? I don't wanna ghost.

But no, I can't allow myself to get sucked up in the drama again.
Click to expand...

You're a decent guy, give her closure. Hopefully she takes it well and not an example of why people need to ghost. Good luck.
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
Black_Red said:
I think I'm too frustrated to write to write the whole story. But I just hit an inflection point.
Me and a coworker liked the same girl (never talked about it, we just knew), he made a move on our farewell party and I didnt :(
Click to expand...

You can't call dibs on a girl, you like her then ask her out. Not put a reserve sticker on her until you are ready.
 
J

Jhoan

Member
GK86 said:
I'm doing much better with OKC this time around. I have three dates lined up for this week. Assuming Mother Nature doesn't ruin shit with her snowstorm.
Click to expand...
I find this an interesting turn around after you were frustrated with it only a few years ago. What made you decide to give it another shot?
 
G

GK86

Homeland Security Fail
Jhoan said:
I find this an interesting turn around after you were frustrated with it only a few years ago. What made you decide to give it another shot?
Click to expand...

It is a combo of things slowing down on tinder and I just moved to a new area of Queens, where there appears to be nothing but bots around me. Figure I would give it another shot.
 
N

NotTheGuyYouKill

Member
I told her that if she wants to be friends, I can do that, but I don't think we can be in a relationship with each other. She messaged me a bunch and then apologized cause she thought it was annoying me cause I'd want space

Just waiting on a response.
 
artsi

artsi

Member
Oblivion said:
I'm wondering if adding a dog to my profile pics would improve my chances of getting responses.

Thoughts?
Click to expand...

My main picture features me and my cat, he's got ton of game. Many times girls open with something related to him.

At the same time it weeds out the ones who don't like cats or are allergic.

I'd say dog will do the same for dog people.
 
S

SmackDaddy

Member
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
She hasn't messaged me since our blowout on Tuesday, but yesterday, she posted a picture of the plush I got her for her birthday with a comment about how it's her best friend with two Spongebob related hashtags, but also #imready

I'm reading way too much into this, right??

And no, I didn't go seeking it out, it was in my feed. My female friend says this is a tactic girls use to throw guys awry, so that I'm thinking "Oh, she's thinking about me, we should totally get back together!"

But I haven't messaged her, and I won't. The more time since the blowout, the more I think... as much as I really like her, I'm not sure a relationship with us would be able to tackle her own issues.

I can't stand when she compares me to her past boyfriends (even if she says she's kidding and apologizes), when she says something feels missing, when she doesn't wanna define what we are, it's all too disconcerting for me.

But I really like her. I feel like I can't be rational and objective, so I've been sharing my whole situation with three of my best friends, and they've been giving me reality checks since Tuesday and they all agree that it doesn't seem like wahtever's going on is fully on the rails.
Click to expand...

dude, spongebob says im ready a ton.

stop reading into this
 
L

Lulubop

Member
Well, I'm in the video but it's for her Husband.

I really hit it off with the other girl tho. I like her a bit and I think she feels the same. Pacific Northwest girls are pretty dope in my experience.
 
O

Ozorov

Member
Lulubop said:
Well, I'm in the video but it's for her Husband.

I really hit it off with the other girl tho. I like her a bit and I think she feels the same. Pacific Northwest girls are pretty dope in my experience.
Click to expand...

You recorded a porno for her husband as some kind of revenge?
 
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