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[gaiages]

I didn't call for a coffee, someone called me out for one out of the blue; with that person I was pretty clear on what I wanted when we first met for instances, and then got nothing but silence for a whole week.
I don't see how specifying "but it's a date, date!" is helpful when you ask them out for dinner, and they take you up on the offer, even if you say hang out.

People don't pick up on hints a lot, even if you think you're being obvious. Why even leave that up to interpretation?

Also like Diaboli said, I asked friends out to things like dinner and coffee fairly often. dinner =/= date.

Hang out generally means something friendly to most people, not "oh it's a surprise date"

 

[FyreWulff]

People don't pick up on hints a lot, even if you think you're being obvious. Why even leave that up to interpretation?

Also like Diaboli said, I asked friends out to things like dinner and coffee fairly often. dinner =/= date.

Hang out generally means something friendly to most people, not "oh it's a surprise date"

this, people just want to grab a coffee or dinner or lunch, it doesn't mean anything more. especially if it's 'hey you wanna go grab a bite'. people will generally tell you if they're asking you on a date.

 

[Prime crotch]

Because otherwise you'd be in a relationship already and not blaming the women.

Anecdotally, I never ever had a problem of making my intentions clear until recently, my previous relationships just followed through. We both just seemed to be in tune.

People don't pick up on hints a lot, even if you think you're being obvious. Why even leave that up to interpretation?"

Mostly because when I used to be more blunt about it the rebuttal was something along the lines of being too direct about it. So I just did what everyone else did, hang out simply came to mean something different.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Mostly because when I used to be more blunt about it the rebuttal was something along the lines of being too direct about it. So I just did what everyone else did, hang out simply came to mean something different.

If someone likes you, it really doesn't matter how you say it. If they're not interested, being oblique wouldn't have worked regardless.

 

[Krauser Kat]

Have you ever had to tell your partner/spouse to give more attention to making you feel good during sex.

Its about caring more about the other persons pleasure then yours, i just dont know how to phrase it yet.

 

[animax]

Have you ever had to tell your partner/spouse to give more attention to making you feel good during sex.

Its about caring more about the other persons pleasure then yours, i just dont know how to phrase it yet.

No, but opening up the dialogue is a good approach. There could possibly be something deeper going on, things you need to discuss.

 

[Llyranor]

For future reference, if any of you get the urge to make a 13-paragraph thread about whether a girl (who you have romantic feelings for) wants to be friends or to be left alone, she wants to be left alone.

 

[timetokill]

For future reference, if any of you get the urge to make a 13-paragraph thread about whether a girl (who you have romantic feelings for) wants to be friends or to be left alone, she wants to be left alone.

:lol Yeah that's a good metric

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Have you ever had to tell your partner/spouse to give more attention to making you feel good during sex.

Its about caring more about the other persons pleasure then yours, i just dont know how to phrase it yet.

Just talk about it. If talking about it isn't possible or the other person isn't receptive to what you're saying, it's a sign of deeper issues and could even be a sign that it's not going to work out long term.

For future reference, if any of you get the urge to make a 13-paragraph thread about whether a girl (who you have romantic feelings for) wants to be friends or to be left alone, she wants to be left alone.

What did I miss?

 

[2Smashed4U]

As much as GAF loves to shit on people taking pictures, taking pictures is a great way to keep memories. If your friends give you shit because you want to take a picture of yourself, tell them they're being douches

Also what are your hobbies, other than gaming?

Yeah, I don't really have an issue taking a pic of myself or anything, I'm just not really likely to get a good group shot or anything like that.

Music though is probably my primary hobby though, but like I said there's not enough that I can really do with that to make it photogenic, unless I'm just being uncreative.

Spoiler

also: drinking, that's another big one.

Yea, i never take pics, never felt the need to. Having Tinder actually forced me to start taking more when I was out and about.

Most important thing is just a clear one of your face, even if it's a selfie. I mean interesting pics help but if I girl finds your face attractive she's not likely to swipe left.

Yeah, I used just have a face pic, and then a few others which I didn't think were so great but I rolled with anyway. I've gotten a few dates already on there before, but I've never really matched with anyone on there before I've been super into besides like one girl, and I'm just wondering if I could be doing more if I had better pics or a better bio or whatever.

 

[Chiaroscuro]

What did I miss?

This I think.

http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=1370497

 

[always crazy bacon]

For future reference, if any of you get the urge to make a 13-paragraph thread about whether a girl (who you have romantic feelings for) wants to be friends or to be left alone, she wants to be left alone.

Zackies novella about a girl you've never kissed rule in action there.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

This I think.

http://m.neogaf.com/showthread.php?t=1370497

Jesus Christ.

I gave up at " She continues messaging me, despite my lack of initiating conversations"

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Jesus Christ.

I gave up at " She continues messaging me, despite my lack of initiating conversations"

You know. Despite this dude doing it wrong overall the first 3 paragraphs of that thing are really not bad. Like he approaches girl. Asks for number. Goes on date. Where it fucks up is the 10 paragraphs after lolol.

But I like the courage at least. He just like shoulda been plain about wanting a relationship and ducked out. Too much talking and convos. Such a hassle, sorts creepy

 

[Salamando]

Yeah, I don't really have an issue taking a pic of myself or anything, I'm just not really likely to get a good group shot or anything like that.

Music though is probably my primary hobby though, but like I said there's not enough that I can really do with that to make it photogenic, unless I'm just being uncreative.

Spoiler

also: drinking, that's another big one.

You lack imagination. Music - Concert pic, pic of you playing an instrument, pic of you with fancy headphones...Drinking - Bar pic, taproom pic, pic of you mixing drinks.

 

[gaiages]

Yeah, I don't really have an issue taking a pic of myself or anything, I'm just not really likely to get a good group shot or anything like that.

Music though is probably my primary hobby though, but like I said there's not enough that I can really do with that to make it photogenic, unless I'm just being uncreative.

Spoiler

also: drinking, that's another big one.

Music - Take a picture with an instrument you play, at a concert, etc
Drinking - Take a picture of you with a nice local craft beer (or the drink of your choice)

You don't have to be super creative to make an interesting picture that gives people ammo to talk about ("ooo what's that drink in your picture?")

Heck people take pics with their pets alllll the time and that gets a lot of conversation starters :3

 

[Peltz]

For future reference, if any of you get the urge to make a 13-paragraph thread about whether a girl (who you have romantic feelings for) wants to be friends or to be left alone, she wants to be left alone.

Really, if you have to ask at all, you probably have your answer. Girls are usually pretty clear about what they want.... well at least the ones worth dating are clear anyway.

 

[True Savior]

Creativity won't get you anywhere on tinder, especially mundane one. You can go all the way in your profile and get matches though. Something completely out of the box is always rewarded (and naturally alienates a lot of people). But you either look good/normal/decent/not a serial killer in those creative photos or whatever you put in there is irrelevant.

 

[2Smashed4U]

You lack imagination. Music - Concert pic, pic of you playing an instrument, pic of you with fancy headphones...Drinking - Bar pic, taproom pic, pic of you mixing drinks.

Music - Take a picture with an instrument you play, at a concert, etc
Drinking - Take a picture of you with a nice local craft beer (or the drink of your choice)

You don't have to be super creative to make an interesting picture that gives people ammo to talk about ("ooo what's that drink in your picture?")

Heck people take pics with their pets alllll the time and that gets a lot of conversation starters :3

Word, I guess I'm just overthinking it haha.

 

[Peltz]

Creativity won't get you anywhere on tinder, especially mundane one. You can go all the way in your profile and get matches though. Something completely out of the box is always rewarded (and naturally alienates a lot of people). But you either look good/normal/decent/not a serial killer in those creative photos or whatever you put in there is irrelevant.

So, I don't want to give out my entire playbook, and I don't recommend anyone else do this, but I put a screenshot of a text my mom sent me as one of my pictures in my profile (the second picture, not my main picture). In it, she was basically telling me how proud she is of me for working hard, being successful, and being such a good son and brother to my sister. (It goes a bit further than that, but that's the general idea). It was a very heartfelt message.

Tons of girls told me it made them swipe right on my profile. It's a bit heavy handed, but it worked way better than any "funny" quote I ever had in my profile or goofy pic I've added to make seem like I had personality. I'm sure it also alienated some women too. But it definitely seems to attract the right types of girls that I'm actually interested in dating. And they seem to take me more seriously because of it.

So I don't think you really need to be witty on these things... But I do think it helps to post something that shows who you really are and what values you have.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Creativity won't get you anywhere on tinder, especially mundane one. You can go all the way in your profile and get matches though. Something completely out of the box is always rewarded (and naturally alienates a lot of people). But you either look good/normal/decent/not a serial killer in those creative photos or whatever you put in there is irrelevant.

Naw. Creativity gon win you some point no matter what. Being attractive helps but women get so many messages. If you have stuff that stands out and makes them want to swipe right apart from looks that puts you at a huge advantage.

Word, I guess I'm just overthinking it haha.

Yes. Just go out and get some fun pics with friends. I say this in all seriousness, take pictures with your friends. They may groan vut they will totally appreciate it as time passes and you will too.

So, I don't want to give out my entire playbook. . .

Please reveal your whole playbook. We're all so far away we cant steal ya thunder

__________

So just leaving Montreal after some vacay. What an awesome city. Yall should check it out if you get the chance.

 

[Megalosaro]

Asked her to a quick dinner after work tonight. Wanted to discuss something in person.
Her apartment is about two blocks my work. I live about 20 miles away.

Today the announced they're closing my office and moving us to LAX. So I'll now be working 40 miles from her.

I wanted to tackle this in person. How do you guys recomend I broach the subject? I want to assure her this won't change anything, only that it'd take a little bit more to get out her way after work. Luckily I get off about an hour and a half before her, so it hasn't been an issue. Usually I hit the gym near my work in the few times we have hung out after.

Is this something I should have just texted about? I dunno.

 

[artsi]

Movie night tomorrow with the girl from saturday, I feel I'm most compatible with her from all my prospects so I have high expectations.

I have to say it's damn funny. I have dated long-term (for 4 years and 5 years) two girls from this local sports team, they knew each other.
This girl is their former teammate, so that would be the third one lol.

 

[Peltz]

Asked her to a quick dinner after work tonight. Wanted to discuss something in person.
Her apartment is about two blocks my work. I live about 20 miles away.

Today the announced they're closing my office and moving us to LAX. So I'll now be working 40 miles from her.

I wanted to tackle this in person. How do you guys recomend I broach the subject? I want to assure her this won't change anything, only that it'd take a little bit more to get out her way after work. Luckily I get off about an hour and a half before her, so it hasn't been an issue. Usually I hit the gym near my work in the few times we have hung out after.

Is this something I should have just texted about? I dunno.

Tell her in person. It's only been a few dates right? Just be clear you want things to continue.

 

[timetokill]

Sigh...
One three word response over the Fri-Mon period.
Not looking good.

 

[jimmypython]

Thanks, you too!

In the interim, I channeled my inner-Dating Age |OT$6| and realized that I've got a date on Monday, another on Tuesday, and just arranged another with a super cute redheaded Jew (my unicorn, fam) who pinged me first.

I'm like, we could say fuck it and go to Shake Shack.

We got eggs. They ain't in baskets.

Spoiler

Sigh.

LOL yeah. same here, arranged two dates later this week, and am debating if I should do another one this week.

The girl Im into is still up in the air as awesome as our first date was last week. We still chat here and there over text but after two times me trying to arrange meet-up and failed I am kinda backing off right now.

it is not fun

 

[Megalosaro]

Tell her in person. It's only been a few dates right? Just be clear you want things to continue.

She shrugged it off like and champ and told me to take her to some safari park near San Diego.

 

[always crazy bacon]

Sigh...
One three word response over the Fri-Mon period.
Not looking good.

Who Ya Gonna Call?

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

That was an interesting first date. I didn't think there was much immediate chemistry, she said she's awkward and doesn't take compliments well, and we definitely talked a lot about verboten subjects, but - all in all, a pleasurable experience, and she asked me out again for next week.

I think I actually got ghosted for tomorrow's date. She originally said "can't do Monday, how about Tuesday?" and I got no response to my confirmation. I offered my number, which she read, but never responded. In any event, I'm okay with writing this one off, since it frees up my week.

The girl from this weekend didn't reach out today either, and I'm going to let that simmer for a while. There's no point in extraneous conversation: I already asked her out and she said yes, so it's just a matter of scheduling.

I'm having the most fun texting the redhead, mostly because I've got no filter, but who knows how we'll be in person.

 

[Megalosaro]

Not gonna lie, I fucking texting. That has been the worst part of this whole thing.

I don't know when to text her, when not to text her, how much to text her etc.

I don't want to ignore her, but I don't want to seem clingy.

 

[timetokill]

Not gonna lie, I fucking texting. That has been the worst part of this whole thing.

I don't know when to text her, when not to text her, how much to text her etc.

I don't want to ignore her, but I don't want to seem clingy.

Aye, there's the rub, eh.

Who Ya Gonna Call?

Are you saying she's ghosting me, or that I should call her? XD

It would be very difficult for her to ghost me right now because we have French class together twice a week.
That said I'm gonna call her tonight to try and set up a date for after class this week.

 

[jimmypython]

Not gonna lie, I fucking texting. That has been the worst part of this whole thing.

I don't know when to text her, when not to text her, how much to text her etc.

I don't want to ignore her, but I don't want to seem clingy.

OMG I also need some advice on this...

 

[always crazy bacon]

OMG I also need some advice on this...

All depends on the person, but generally moderation is the key. Don't become a texting buddy or text so much that you have nothing to talk about on the date.

How often do you text your good friend? Don't do more than that before you've become exclusive.

Learn to cut off conversations with "I've got some work to do now/driving/sports I'll text you later" so they don't always expect you to be available.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Sigh...
One three word response over the Fri-Mon period.
Not looking good.

Look for other girls. You dont have to shut this down but in the same notion if the effort is only coming from one side you should invest yours in otger avenues.

 

[timetokill]

Look for other girls. You dont have to shut this down but in the same notion if the effort is only coming from one side you should invest yours in otger avenues.

Yeah, I've been looking around a bit this weekend. We'll see.

 

[Lulubop]

To poor to date atm, shame cause my tinder is blowing up more than ever. I'll be back, stronger, fitter and with money to go out.

good luck brehs

 

[always crazy bacon]

To poor to date atm, shame cause my tinder is blowing up more than ever. I'll be back, stronger, fitter and with money to go out.

good luck brehs

Shame to waste those matches. Go for broke and see how many would want a coffee date or if you can't afford that Netflix and chill or a walk in the park. It's all about you and not how much money you spend right?

 

[Lulubop]

I am thinking about doing some ice cream/ park dates now that it's getting warmer, but sober park dates aren't my strong suit. Things work better for me when we're vibing and there's alcohol involved. I should probably find a coffee spot I really like in my area too.

 

[timetokill]

Who Ya Gonna Call?

lol found the girl I sit next to every French class (not the same girl as the one I'm already dating) on Bumble, put Like

no lose situation, i can laugh this one off hahaha

 

[LyleLanley]

Shame to waste those matches. Go for broke and see how many would want a coffee date or if you can't afford that Netflix and chill or a walk in the park. It's all about you and not how much money you spend right?

Inviting tinder girls to watch Netflix for a first date does not seem like a plan that will go down well.

 

[Lulubop]

Inviting tinder girls to watch Netflix for a first date does not seem like a plan that will go down well.

It doesn't really, but I've had my fair share of being invited over or successfully inviting someone over right away. Of course I don't open with it, but it kinda works itself out sometimes. Maybe I just open with it sometimes.

 

[ZackieChan]

Inviting tinder girls to watch Netflix for a first date does not seem like a plan that will go down well.

He's a hot looking dude. He can probably be successful

 

[artsi]

Inviting tinder girls to watch Netflix for a first date does not seem like a plan that will go down well.

It's cool, just pick those matches that seem like they're DTF. They'll say yes.

Nice girls get a date.

 

[Peltz]

To poor to date atm, shame cause my tinder is blowing up more than ever. I'll be back, stronger, fitter and with money to go out.

good luck brehs

Just ask girls to go for a walk with you to central park or something. Money isn't as important (for some girls) as you'd think.

 

[always crazy bacon]

Inviting tinder girls to watch Netflix for a first date does not seem like a plan that will go down well.

Hence my framing of the suggestion "Go for broke" AKA nothing to lose.

 

[Subpar Scrub]

I don't know why, but I have a feeling that a date I've tried to set up for this Friday night just isn't going to happen. Like, she'll make an excuse last minute or not reply or something.

Honestly, I haven't tried dating in a serious capacity for 3 or 4 years and I'm way more anxious getting back into it than I thought I'd be. Man, this is going to be rough haha

 

[always crazy bacon]

I don't know why, but I have a feeling that a date I've tried to set up for this Friday night just isn't going to happen. Like, she'll make an excuse last minute or not reply or something.

Honestly, I haven't tried dating in a serious capacity for 3 or 4 years and I'm way more anxious getting back into it than I thought I'd be. Man, this is going to be rough haha

You'll learn to have more than one girl to talk to at the same time so you have a backup for the flakers. This Friday girl isn't the only opportunity you'll have.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Yeah, I've been looking around a bit this weekend. We'll see.

Meh, just full blown go in. There is no down side to swiping. It doesn't cost you anything. The way I see it from what you posted here about that girl is she seeing other guys. So you need to be fully invested in also seeing other people. Don't wait for her or on her. Pointless exercise. Roll the dice man. That's that shit that gets change.

I don't know why, but I have a feeling that a date I've tried to set up for this Friday night just isn't going to happen. Like, she'll make an excuse last minute or not reply or something.

Honestly, I haven't tried dating in a serious capacity for 3 or 4 years and I'm way more anxious getting back into it than I thought I'd be. Man, this is going to be rough haha

Even 10/10s get stood up. Don't get too high, don't get to low about a date prospect. Until it materializes its just a plan on the calender. Nothing more, nothing less.

 

[saizo]

Got invited by some coworkers to go for a hike which was supposed to be a "set up" with a girl from work who think I'm "cute and funny".

We were supposed to go on like a night hike.

Hang out, start doing shots.
Supervisor comes by, starts doing shots.
Said girl shows up, drinking continues.

Roughly 30 minutes later everyone is making out with everyone.
No party was excluded.

Me and said girl were the only straight ones.
Too drunk, ding dong didn't work though not for lack of trying on her part.
What the fuck just happened to me gaf.

I'm currently going through the post-party mid-hangover, re-hashing/regretting with a hint of "should I be proud" and "I feel ashamed".

tl;dr
Made out with 2 lesbians and a straight girl. We were supposed to go hiking. Now whining about feelings.

 

[Krauser Kat]

I have a bar close to my house that is pretty trendy. If a girl seems DTF. I try and plan the date there. They have board games too. After a drink or two at the most, I askif they want to meet my corgi.

Works 95% of the time.