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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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P

Peltz

Member
LichtenbergFigures said:
That would explain it haha



Sure, this is true I'm not expecting such a massive response rate, but is there any real evidence a decent profile blurb makes a difference on Tinder? (If there is, please link me to it, genuinely interested). I actually believe on island, most women are purely curious, rather than genuinely looking. Let's see who's on Tinder for a laugh.
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I had no description in any of my profiles and still had a few thousand matches. It's more about location and the quality of your photos than anything else.

I am in Manhattan by the way. So there's just a constant influx of single women here. And that's over 2-3 years of swiping.
 
N

Neoweee

Member
LucidMomentum said:
But lets be honest, on apps like Tinder and such looks go a long way.

But in the end it is a numbers game and having enough things in your profile to catch someone's eye helps increase your odds.
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"Go a long way", sure, but "apps like Tinder" aren't all Tinder. Profiles can and do help on CMB or Bumble. OKC is even more in favor of having good profiles. I get a good number of messages that reference things I list on OKC.

---------

Match # is a bad metric, because it is easy to get matches with a bunch of women that I'm not attracted to. I like that most of the apps have taken stops to discourage "swipe right on every single women" as the only viable strategy.

In a large city, Tinder has tens of thousands of women in their 20s and 30s.
In New York, that is probably hundreds of thousands. If you have decent pictures, clothes that fit, and aren't obese, and you swipe right on every woman, you're going to end up with hundreds of matches, and thousands if you're good looking. But that doesn't mean anything if that's people you don't want to date.
 
R

RobertRaviolli

Member
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
 
P

Peltz

Member
RobertRaviolli said:
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
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Hey man, you did well. It may suck now, but rejections are a comforting thing if you really think about it. It helps you weed out people in your life who wouldn't appreciate you the way you deserve. And it gives you solid concrete answers instead of leaving you in an emotional "gray area."

Trust me, a solid rejection is better than most other outcomes. Enjoy feeling like shit temporarily and then never needing to worry about this girl again. You're free and clear.
 
G

Gotdatmoney

Member
RobertRaviolli said:
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
Click to expand...

You get points for asking. Dont feel like you need to actually remain friends with her either. If ya cant then just dont hangout with her. No shame in that.
 
L

Llyranor

Member
RobertRaviolli said:
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
Click to expand...
Consider the alternative. You could have spent the next few months/years wondering whether she likes you as more than a friend. Think of all the time and energy and heartbreak you just saved, this is ultimately a good thing for you even if it doesn't feel that way right now.
 
M

Megalosaro

Banned
always crazy bacon said:
You're one step closer to finding someone that will want to date you. Next time ask a girl out quicker rather than developing crushes.
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Great advice that I wish I knew sooner. Crushes are BAD. The moment you have the feelings, you should act. Otherwise it's not fair to you.

I've wasted years on crushes.

Don't waste the time, emotions and energy. Girl is unavailable? Don't get fixated. There are tons of awesome girls out there
 
R

RobertRaviolli

Member
Thanks all of you guys for the words of encouragement. It was one of the most awkard phone calls of my entire life but in the end It was the right thing to do and I feel like I've got a burden of my chest. So,if anyone is reading this and is in the same situation that I was, dont be afraid, listen to the OT and just ask her out; even if she rejects you, It wont be half as bad as you think It's going to be
Gotdatmoney said:
You get points for asking. Dont feel like you need to actually remain friends with her either. If ya cant then just dont hangout with her. No shame in that.
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I dont want to stop hanging out with her, she's a wonderful person and she's been a good friend to me and I dont want to end our friendship just because she rejected me
 
S

Subpar Scrub

Banned
RobertRaviolli said:
I dont want to stop hanging out with her, she's a wonderful person and she's been a good friend to me and I dont want to end our friendship just because she rejected me
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As long as you feel you can without it interfering with your desire to date others and it doesn't cause you any issues, go ahead dude. Good job asking, you're now free to pursue others and that takes guts.
 
Baki

Baki

Member
RobertRaviolli said:
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
Click to expand...

Silver lining. She was upfront about it & didn't accept and then ghost you. Has happened a few times before to me. Seems to be a millenial thing.

Note to self: Never trust anyone that orders Avocado toast.
 
A

Astral

Member
I need a quick first date idea for what's looking to be tonight. Idk what to suggest. She's not a big drinker and I don't really feel like drinking even though it might help me a little.

EDIT: Fuck it we decided on a quiet bar by my place.
 
S

Stopdoor

Member
Is Pizza a good first date idea? Haven't really seen anyone mention it before, you could playfully argue about toppings and discover how compatible you are on an important level.
 
S

SmackDaddy

Member
Stopdoor said:
Is Pizza a good first date idea? Haven't really seen anyone mention it before, you could playfully argue about toppings and discover how compatible you are on an important level.
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yep! on about the same level as a coffee date.

Don't think that much into it, first date is just to hang out. Shit, it could be a walk in the park to a frutas stand.

Edit, actually taking the first date too casually got me burned last time. I had her meet me halfway (we live in LA) and she said that was disrespectful (but, I think that's some high-maintenance bullshit). There was some cultural stuff going on though, turns out she and I were NOT on the same wavelength. Be a gentleman as much as possible. Offer to pay if it's cheap, have a plan if the date runs long or short- what else is by the place? Most uncomfortable thing on a date is when there is no direction or plan. Don't ask her for input.

Astral said:
I need a quick first date idea for what's looking to be tonight. Idk what to suggest. She's not a big drinker and I don't really feel like drinking even though it might help me a little.

EDIT: Fuck it we decided on a quiet bar by my place.
Click to expand...

dessert place, coffee shop, antique store, ice cream stand, book store, pretty much anything.
 
Baki

Baki

Member
Gaffers.

Think I caught some of the feels for this girl. I think I'm going to care if she ghosts me.

Dammnit.
 
Baki

Baki

Member
Peltz said:
Feels and caring are all good things.

I mean... don't get me wrong. They suckkkkkk. But they're good.
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Hahah I feel ya brahhhhhhhhhhhhh ;)

Ideallly want to catch the feels for someone with mutual feels.

Subpar Scrub said:
Hey, I'm forgoing a home to sustain my daily intake of $129 smashed avo on toast, least you could do is trust me.
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I respect the discipline brah

Quick update -- I'm now 99% sure she's ghosting me. God damn millenials. I think I'm just going to date baby boomers now lmao. Atleast I'll get a straight yes or no.
 
A

Astral

Member
Just got back from my date. She was chubby as I suspected. She didn't have any body pics. I wasn't really attracted to her but she was cool. I think we were both not feeling it though so thankfully our desire to not see each other again will probably be mutual.
 
S

Subpar Scrub

Banned
Astral said:
Just got back from my date. She was chubby as I suspected. She didn't have any body pics.
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I still don't get this. I'm muscular but also overweight (working on it fam) and I'll still include a body pic once I turn on my online dating profiles. Last thing I want is for the person I'm meeting with to:

1. Not be physically attracted to me

2. Feel tricked

Why would anyone think that's a good idea?
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
Astral said:
Just got back from my date. She was chubby as I suspected. She didn't have any body pics. I wasn't really attracted to her but she was cool. I think we were both not feeling it though so thankfully our desire to not see each other again will probably be mutual.
Click to expand...

No full body shot rule strikes again.
 
M

Miles Quaritch

Member
Man, how are people still getting played by the no body shot rule?

If they don't have any, ask for one. If they aren't forthcoming, you know there's some junk in that trunk. It's not a bad thing and chubby/fat people need love too (see our boy Zackie), but you can't keep letting yourselves be played like this.
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
Miles Quaritch said:
Man, how are people still getting played by the no body shot rule?

If they don't have any, ask for one. If they aren't forthcoming, you know there's some junk in that trunk. It's not a bad thing and chubby/fat people need love too (see our boy Zackie), but you can't keep letting yourselves be played like this.
Click to expand...

so-youre-telling-me-theres-a-chance.jpg
 
S

Salamando

Member
Meanwhile I've been feeling like I've been suffering from some weird status ailment.

After I ended things with Anti-Disney on Monday, began chatting another girl. Didn't talk too much. Tuesday morning, Therapy appointment. Over the natural course of conversation, we talked about how I'm dealing with being single, and how I'd react to my (long-deceased) Father's Birthday on Wednesday. Uncorking those two topics together unleashed a torrent of bad energy. When I started talking to that girl again, we talked too long; i got too invested. Asked her out, and waited for her response....waited so long I missed my run, missed being able to grab dinner, missed getting to bed at a decent hour...that in turn set Wednesday on a terrible course...

Lesson learned - You should avoid online dating if you're in the wrong mindspace. Can't fault the therapist, most of the reason I'm there is to let myself feel emotions more instead of existing in logic-land. Guess it's working.
 
M

Messofanego

Banned
RobertRaviolli said:
Called my crush and I asked her on a date, she rejected me and told me she would like to be hang out only as friends, well... It's gonna be hard as fuck but I guess It's time to move on
Click to expand...
Glad you got this earlier than later, so you don't have to waste time pining for her.
Miles Quaritch said:
Man, how are people still getting played by the no body shot rule?

If they don't have any, ask for one. If they aren't forthcoming, you know there's some junk in that trunk. It's not a bad thing and chubby/fat people need love too (see our boy Zackie), but you can't keep letting yourselves be played like this.
Click to expand...
Leave Zackie senpai alone!
leave-britney-alone-02.jpg
 
Z

ZackieChan

Member
Thanks bro

Subpar Scrub said:
???



Non-existent or heavily edited?
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We all want them, won't get them, and if we saw them we'd want nothing to do with their subject

always crazy bacon said:
You've gotta stop retconning dude, because we weren't reading easy mode posts from you.
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I lol'd. So true.
Miles Quaritch said:
Man, how are people still getting played by the no body shot rule?

If they don't have any, ask for one. If they aren't forthcoming, you know there's some junk in that trunk. It's not a bad thing and chubby/fat people need love too (see our boy Zackie), but you can't keep letting yourselves be played like this.
Click to expand...

My bod is in my photos. It's just that my face is so handsome it distracts the eye.
 
P

Peltz

Member
ZackieChan said:
Dem full body shots are like Trump's tax returns
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dead2.gif


Salamando said:
Meanwhile I've been feeling like I've been suffering from some weird status ailment.

After I ended things with Anti-Disney on Monday, began chatting another girl. Didn't talk too much. Tuesday morning, Therapy appointment. Over the natural course of conversation, we talked about how I'm dealing with being single, and how I'd react to my (long-deceased) Father's Birthday on Wednesday. Uncorking those two topics together unleashed a torrent of bad energy. When I started talking to that girl again, we talked too long; i got too invested. Asked her out, and waited for her response....waited so long I missed my run, missed being able to grab dinner, missed getting to bed at a decent hour...that in turn set Wednesday on a terrible course...

Lesson learned - You should avoid online dating if you're in the wrong mindspace. Can't fault the therapist, most of the reason I'm there is to let myself feel emotions more instead of existing in logic-land. Guess it's working.
Click to expand...

Take a break from dating. Just focus on you, dude. Single girls will always be there when you're ready. There's no rush, I assure you.
 
C

Chance Hale

Member
Could someone give me a brief Coffee Meets Bagel primer? Been using tinder on and off over the last year with decent success in terms of short term hook ups but given the lack of bio info there's been a lot of awkward or boring dates/meetings with people I have zero chemistry or interest with outside of looks. It's less hook up focused right? Mainly just tired of meeting up with conspiracy nuts and I like the more detailed profiles without the mess of okcupid.

Confused about the discover menu too, if I choose to spend.......beans to get the bagel/profile of someone that is interesting is that the same as liking the ones given automatically each day or is it a super like equivalent? Also, how does the pooling work? I liked 3 of the first people that showed up when I finished my profile and is that instantly sent to them to review and like back/ignore or does it take a few days?
 
Z

ZackieChan

Member
You'll show up as their daily bagel at some point, then if they like you, it's a match. I've had it happen same day, and sometimes weeks later. Just go with it bro.

Don't spend money on it. Get those beans by tweeting and shit.
 
Z

ZackieChan

Member
Chance Hale said:
To clarify I did mean spend beans as in the currency, not spend money to get more. Certainly in no rush, I still have Tinder lol.
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If you see someone so awesome you want to spend beans for a chance she likes you back, go for it. But I rarely do, and I don't get many matches anyway.
 
S

Subpar Scrub

Banned
gaiages said:
His joke was kind of tasteless... I'm sure he'll be back though, I've seen far worse on GAF just the last few days alone =_=
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I chuckled a bit before thinking "man, that's not great though. I wonder how he didn't get... OH NOOO".

I think he's also someone who is racking up the bans though, needs to be careful.
 
M

Miles Quaritch

Member
Well...someone post it or at least link to it?

I'm on my last warning as it happens. I mean, I try not to be a cunt to other posters, but I guess it just happens naturally...
 
Raptomex

Raptomex

Member
GF and I broke up after 2 years this past weekend. On good terms, thankfully. It was a mutual decision. Long story short, she's an extrovert, I'm very introverted, and it finally caught up to us. Still, we had good times and were loyal to each other. Didn't level up but at least I gained plenty of XP.
 
M

Miles Quaritch

Member
Raptomex said:
GF and I broke up after 2 years this past weekend. On good terms, thankfully. It was a mutual decision. Long story short, she's an extrovert, I'm very introverted, and it finally caught up to us. Still, we had good times and were loyal to each other. Didn't level up but at least I gained plenty of XP.
Click to expand...

Are you still as introverted as when you first met?
 
G

Gotdatmoney

Member
Miles Quaritch said:
Well...someone post it or at least link to it?

I'm on my last warning as it happens. I mean, I try not to be a cunt to other posters, but I guess it just happens naturally...
Click to expand...

Noooooo. Stay safe :(

Surprisingly I have never seen the hammer. I'm sure I have been really close though. I operate in very dark shades of gray.
 
S

Subpar Scrub

Banned
Messofanego said:
Count Dookkake is always about that first post dark joke life but this time it involved a dead person so he flew too close to the sun.
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I thought the dude who got hit by the car survived?

ZackieChan said:
I lol'd at it. Does that make me a terrible person?
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If so I'll burn with you bruh.

Gotdatmoney said:
Surprisingly I have never seen the hammer. I'm sure I have been really close though. I operate in very dark shades of gray.
Click to expand...

Don't worry, it may happen when you least expect it. I was banned for 2 weeks for "using sarcasm in a rude way towards another poster" and again for 1 week like 8-10 months later for "utilising too many exclamation points. This conveys an overly aggressive tone which is unappreciated on NeoGaf". The sarcasm one I understood, the exclamation one I didn't. It's weird sometimes.
 
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