Support NeoGAF

[Ozorov]

If I unmatch someone on Tinder, am I able to re-match with them on some later point? I unmatched the wrong person haha

 

[gimz]

YO YO YO! Move on.

Hahaha

 

[Denzar]

If I unmatch someone on Tinder, am I able to re-match with them on some later point? I unmatched the wrong person haha

Yes.Pretty sure you can.

Hi, the guy that tells his friends not to get overinvested is overinvesting in a girl. I think. Met this gorgeous girl a couple of weeks back. Thought of her a couple of times. She left an impression on me, and honestly that rarely happens these days. I meet plenty of girls, but none seem to really interest me. Unfortunately.

So I saw this girl again friday night. Both not in the most sober of states. Barely 2 sentences after saying hello her lips graze mine. It was obvious she wanted to make out. So that happened. It was fun, both of us got riled up. She wanted to take me to the bathroom stalls but we got busted. We talked a little. She told me she found me attractive and that she had not forgotten about me since we met. Lots of hugs, pecks on the lips, drowning in eachother's eyes and all that. She asked for my number and we agreed that we should go out together some time. I wanted tot take her home, but her friend wanted to leave and took the girl with her. Fair enough. Had a great feeling about it all. I finish my beer and leave as well. 2 mins. later she telephones me asking me what I'm doing and saying she wanted to hear my voice again. I go to bed, satisfied and genuinely interested in this girl.

The day after, some flirty texting. We both decide to stay at home because we're both hung over and glued to our sofas. Yesterday noon, I ask her out. Haven't heard from her since then. Total silence. I'm probably overinvesting, right? She probably just wanted to schmang. I should probably try to relax. I feel like a headless chicken.

 

[Jokab]

I don't think it's as simple as saying that you're acting clingy. I actually don't think that's even the real issue here. I think there might be a deeper reason behind this whole ordeal, so here's my stab at it.

Based on a few nuggets of information that you gave, I get the impression that there's some sort of scarcity-related issue you may have about women that caused you to string yourself to this blatantly dead-end experience. As a result, you haven't been letting the reality of this situation sink in; and instead of saying "fuck this" and moving on, you basically tried to give her more opportunities to try and become the girl you envisioned her to be.

So, I don't think you're clingy-obsessed with her... I think you just chose to wait too long for the chance to meet the version of her that doesn't actually exist.

Take a step back for a moment and think about what makes for a great dating venture. It should be fun, seamless, exciting, and full of connection potential from two people that seem truly ready to meet a future partner. With that in mind, it's crystal clear that your time with this girl hasn't left you feeling any of those things whatsoever. Instead, you've allowed yourself to remain thrown for a perpetual loop -- offering up patience, consideration, and multiple attempts that this girl clearly hasn't earned.

Perhaps she really is a good person at her core, but all you've seen is her troubled side, and that's not the kind of dynamic that ever leads to success in the dating/relationship realm. So, you don't need to waste your effort or thought-energy on someone like that, and you damn sure don't need to send yourself spinning when there's all sorts of other women out there that are far more capable of facilitating fun and enjoyable dating experiences with you. But, do you believe that? That's the real question here.

It's time to start asking yourself how you can prevent yourself from allowing experiences like this to drag on in the future, because let me tell you... this won't be the last time you'll meet and date someone as aloof and as conflicted as that girl. If you truly understand that there are loads of better options at your fingertips, which you should, you won't leave a window open for this kind of shit, and you definitely won't let it cause you to come unhinged with calls and texts to inquire about what's wrong, and why shit doesn't feel right (which is why people assumed you were just straight clingy).

Instead, you'd realize that you can't be someone's date and someone's psychologist at the same time, and simply move on.

A bit late but I just want to chime in and say that this was my dating experience the first eight months or so of my dating career. I never had any experience with women before I hopped on Tinder, and well, cue eight months of short-lived dating streaks in all of which I put way too much effort in for what I was getting back. One girl that I dated for a few months even told me in the end that I came off as desperate and that I just wanted a girlfriend. She also said some other really spiteful things that probably contributed to me disregarding her "advice" (she called it that), but in the end that part was true.

 

[names2hard4you]

So did she ever offer a reason for being, I forgot what you said, like 1.5 hrs late? I mean, that's next level.


Hopefully it doesn't happen again. Good that it went well

She did, poor time management. She had to pick up her little brother and thought she'd be able to get ready in time. The fact that I told her I hadn't left my house yet (when I only said it just to be nice) 30mins prior to the actual date made her stop rushing and take her time which lead to that whole thing. At least she made up for it by rearranging our plans in the same day, that alone made me give her a second shot. It was worth it in the end lol.

 

[gaiages]

If your partner gains 40 pounds within 2 years of becoming a couple how do you deal with that? The physical attraction is really hurt by it.

Talk to them about it. I managed to gain 40 lbs within, like, 8 months of meeting my SO. He wasn't bothered by it, and it's likely the weight gain is from a medical condition, but it's important that if you have a problem with it to voice that opinion.

Of course, it's going to be a touchy subject, so going BITCH YOU'RE FAT STOP EATING CUPCAKES isn't going to work.

Spoiler

You'd think that's obvious, but that's exactly what my ex did... who also weighed a lot more than me, but enough complaining from me

I'd frame it more as you being worried about her health, and seeing if you can help.

If she refuses to change, or try to change, that's your sign to gtfo.

 

[Ozorov]

Just went for my first ever Tinder"date". Went okey I think (always hard to judge I suppose). Cute girl, lots of laughs and our talk seemed natural. But I was stupid enough not to ask for a second date.

 

[gaiages]

Just went for my first ever Tinder"date". Went okey I think (always hard to judge I suppose). Cute girl, lots of laughs and our talk seemed natural. But I was stupid enough not to ask for a second date.

Why not just ask now, then? Or whenever it's a decent time, it might still be early in the morning where you live.

 

[Ozorov]

Why not just ask now, then? Or whenever it's a decent time, it might still be early in the morning where you live.

Yeah I guess I could, I'll ask her tonight. Just feels weak not to ask in person and do it "online".

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Talk to them about it. I managed to gain 40 lbs within, like, 8 months of meeting my SO. He wasn't bothered by it, and it's likely the weight gain is from a medical condition, but it's important that if you have a problem with it to voice that opinion.

Of course, it's going to be a touchy subject, so going BITCH YOU'RE FAT STOP EATING CUPCAKES isn't going to work.

Spoiler

You'd think that's obvious, but that's exactly what my ex did... who also weighed a lot more than me, but enough complaining from me

I'd frame it more as you being worried about her health, and seeing if you can help.

If she refuses to change, or try to change, that's your sign to gtfo.

How did he justify his being overweight while telling​ you you're fat? Did he think his blubber was unrealised potential or some shit?

 

[ZackieChan]

Yeah I guess I could, I'll ask her tonight. Just feels weak not to ask in person and do it "online".

How'd you ask the first time, then?
Get over this silly stuff. You'll be better off for it.

 

[Llyranor]

Didn't you hear? Guys can let themselves go, but girls have to stay in shape for optimal ogling.

 

[M52B28]

I've pretty much alienated myself from other women and I've made it so hard for me to even begin looking again.

Part of me wants to hold off until I move, but I want the rush of finding someone new.

Sadly, I'm still holding on with the woman that I've mentioned here. There's something there, but it just won't work, so I'm starting to break it off.

 

[Count Dookkake]

Didn't you hear? Guys can let themselves go, but girls have to stay in shape for optimal ogling.

I challenge you to find anyone in this thread who has said anything resembling this.

EDIT: Oh you're responding to an anecdote from another poster. Phew.

 

[Ozorov]

How'd you ask the first time, then?
Get over this silly stuff. You'll be better off for it.

Haha yeah I know you are right. Will do sir.

 

[Ray Wonder]

I was fat like a year and a half ago. I wish someone would've called me a fat piggy like 5 years ago, I'd have lost it ASAP.

 

[Ashby]

I was fat like a year and a half ago. I wish someone would've called me a fat piggy like 5 years ago, I'd have lost it ASAP.

What worked for you for weight loss?

 

[Ray Wonder]

What worked for you for weight loss?

I ate grilled chicken salad with a tiny bit of low fat dressing for lunch everyday, and like a quarter portion of the amount of dinner I'd normally eat. With baggies of fruit for snacking. Also, I ran everyday. Started out at 2 miles, within 3 months I was up to about 7-10 a day.
From the beginning of July, to mid October, 2015, I lost 55 lbs.

Now I'm back to being a lazy fuck, but my stomach has adjusted, and now eating half as much makes me full. So I haven't really gained anything back.

If I relapse, and have a single pizza roll, I'll binge and be fat in 4 days though. So I've cut them off completely.

 

[Count Dookkake]

Nice work, Ray.

And what you say about that pizza roll is true. Like any addiction, once you've beaten it, you can never safely indulge.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Yeah, good work but you should be able to treat yourself occasionally without gaining weight, or do you mean once you start you won't stop eating those things...

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I've pretty much alienated myself from other women and I've made it so hard for me to even begin looking again.

Part of me wants to hold off until I move, but I want the rush of finding someone new.

Sadly, I'm still holding on with the woman that I've mentioned here. There's something there, but it just won't work, so I'm starting to break it off.

How have you alienated every single woman around you or are you using that as a made up excuse?

 

[Ozorov]

I ate grilled chicken salad with a tiny bit of low fat dressing for lunch everyday, and like a quarter portion of the amount of dinner I'd normally eat. With baggies of fruit for snacking. Also, I ran everyday. Started out at 2 miles, within 3 months I was up to about 7-10 a day.
From the beginning of July, to mid October, 2015, I lost 55 lbs.

Now I'm back to being a lazy fuck, but my stomach has adjusted, and now eating half as much makes me full. So I haven't really gained anything back.

If I relapse, and have a single pizza roll, I'll binge and be fat in 4 days though. So I've cut them off completely.

Well done Ray

 

[Ray Wonder]

Nice work, Ray.

And what you say about that pizza roll is true. Like any addiction, once you've beaten it, you can never safely indulge.

I know myself, and I don't trust myself. So I won't enable the behavior in any form.

Yeah, good work but you should be able to treat yourself occasionally without gaining weight, or do you mean once you start you won't stop eating those things...

I'm saying if I have a bag of 45 pizza rolls in my house, they're going to be gone that day. I have no self control when it comes to pizza rolls. Especially if I have a few drinks that night. I'll wake up next to a plate with crumbs and remnants of ranch/hotsauce mixed together and pizza sauce on my chin.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Ah, I get you now. Keep up the good work.

But, to be clear, they are called calzones.

 

[Ray Wonder]

Ah, I get you now. Keep up the good work.

But, to be clear, they are called calzones.

I'm specifically speaking about Totino's Pepperoni Pizza Rolls

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Yeah, those are calzones. Calling them pizza rolls doesn't change the fact they are calzones.

This is all that's wrong with society. Dumbing shit down. Calzones​ motherfuckers. Calzones.

Say it with me Ray. Calzones.

 

[Count Dookkake]

TIL: "Pizza roll" is Miles Quaritch's "quadrilogy."

 

[Miles Quaritch]

TIL: "Pizza roll" is Miles Quaritch's "quadrilogy."

They are calzones though. I don't care what the stupid ass box says, they are calzones and anyone who says otherwise best be ready to throw hands.

Motherfuckers out here dumbing shit down is why we got Trump. If anyone calls those pizza rolls, I'm throwing you in with Trump supporters.

 

[Count Dookkake]

Yeah, and "quadrilogy" is a word for idiots, created by a marketing department.

The real word is tetralogy.

 

[gaiages]

How did he justify his being overweight while telling​ you you're fat? Did he think his blubber was unrealised potential or some shit?

I never asked, but the question was always in the back of my mind, LOL

I ate grilled chicken salad with a tiny bit of low fat dressing for lunch everyday, and like a quarter portion of the amount of dinner I'd normally eat. With baggies of fruit for snacking. Also, I ran everyday. Started out at 2 miles, within 3 months I was up to about 7-10 a day.
From the beginning of July, to mid October, 2015, I lost 55 lbs.

Now I'm back to being a lazy fuck, but my stomach has adjusted, and now eating half as much makes me full. So I haven't really gained anything back.

If I relapse, and have a single pizza roll, I'll binge and be fat in 4 days though. So I've cut them off completely.

Congrats on the weight loss! I feel you on the pizza rolls thing >.> I can't eat those and a few other things, I'd weigh 300 lbs in a week's time if I let one touch my tastebuds lolol

Yeah, those are calzones. Calling them pizza rolls doesn't change the fact they are calzones.

This is all that's wrong with society. Dumbing shit down. Calzones​ motherfuckers. Calzones.

Say it with me Ray. Calzones.

Okay Ben Wyatt, calm down

 

[Leeness]

Kinda funny you mentioned this... I know a coworker whose married in her early 20's and I swear... its like she flirts nearly all the time. I've managed to become friends with her because she's hilarious but I never cross the line.

Always best to just close your eyes and fantasize. Lol

And...

Spoiler

you rarely have crushes?

I hope I can become friends with this guy, though I don't think we would be friends outside of work. But maybe...

And no, I don't. At least not to this extent. Maybe two in my life like this.

Of course, it's going to be a touchy subject, so going BITCH YOU'RE FAT STOP EATING CUPCAKES isn't going to work.

Spoiler

You'd think that's obvious, but that's exactly what my ex did... who also weighed a lot more than me, but enough complaining from me

Imma fight this guy for you.

And I can relate (kind of). The two high school guys that treated me like shit always called me a waste or that I'd "never be anything", "like look at you" and would tell me I was just a retail worker...at 16...when they had no jobs themselves.

But I was always the "stepping stone on the way to greatness" and the "just holding back my potential".

And Ray, congrats on the weight loss! I lost about 40lbs a couple of years ago and have kept it (relatively) off.

 

[Ray Wonder]

TIL: "Pizza roll" is Miles Quaritch's "quadrilogy."

You've lost me, I don't even know how to pronounce that word.

They are calzones though. I don't care what the stupid ass box says, they are calzones and anyone who says otherwise best be ready to throw hands.

Motherfuckers out here dumbing shit down is why we got Trump. If anyone calls those pizza rolls, I'm throwing you in with Trump supporters.

You need to use some emojis, I can't tell if you're angry or not.

Congrats on the weight loss! I feel you on the pizza rolls thing >.> I can't eat those and a few other things, I'd weigh 300 lbs in a week's time if I let one touch my tastebuds lolol

It's hard work, if someone wanted to sabotage my life, they could just put a box of them in the fridge.

Well done Ray

Thanks!

And Ray, congrats on the weight loss! I lost about 40lbs a couple of years ago and have kept it (relatively) off.

Congrats! I feel you on "relatively" I've gained like 4-5 in a year and a half.

 

[Johnny Cage In The Shower]

Hi Lads, just dropping in to say things have been going well with the lady for the past three weeks...I'm at work now, but I have quite a few (while dating) questions, I want to keep this good thing going as smoothly as possible.

If one advice I could give is try to plan a date with a Tinder (online dating) date as soon as you can, don;t get caught up telling your life story via text messages for two-three weeks...More often than not, leads to disappointments and dead ends.

Nothing is certain unless a girl is comfortable around you physically, and all the smooth chatting via text isn't going to do anything for you on that regard.

So get out there and talk to her, face to face, eye to eye, tit to tit!

 

[Wurst]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

 

[Count Dookkake]

Do not do that. Ever.

Just make your move.

 

[Kurita]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

Nah this is corny, sorry.
Simply ask her if she wants to hang out.

 

[Llyranor]

There's nothing to be jealous about when it comes to all-you-eat sushi.

And wtf, don't do that. Or go all out and sneak a crown of sonnets in there.

 

[Ray Wonder]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

First off, don't do this. Holy shit, it's the cringiest thing I've ever heard, and I'm corny as fuck.

I need clarifications:

Have you been on dates with this girl?

What are these confusing signals?

 

[gaiages]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

Why not just... ask her out on a date...?

Nah this is corny, sorry.
Simply ask her if she wants to hang out.

No, not hanging out, a date. He has to make it clear, saying 'hanging out' is a friend thing. Nothing will get anywhere if he isn't clear with his intentions.

 

[always crazy bacon]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

You like her, and you think the way to find out is to kiss her and not ask her on a date? I suspect the "signals" are just her being friendly. You're going to have to give us more of the story.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

That shit only works in movies, you should cringe you even had to ask. Don't do anything like that, ask her for a date and you'll have your answer.

 

[Llyranor]

What are the confusing signals, anyway? She makes eye contact when you talk and laughs at your jokes, but talks to you about her dates with other ppl and makes out with them in front of you, or what?

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

Jesus fucking christ.

To clarify, fuck no do not do this.

 

[Count Dookkake]

High-level play:

"This ain't the only cookie getting eaten today."

 

[Ray Wonder]

I just don't know anymore :S

While working on the project, after she's laughing at something you said or you're talking about something, just ask. Like "Hey, do you want to go out on a date sometime?" Don't overthink the question, or think about how romantic it is.

High-level play:

"This ain't the only cookie getting eaten today."

Oh, fuck yes. I'm doing this.

 

[SomTervo]

The day after, some flirty texting. We both decide to stay at home because we're both hung over and glued to our sofas. Yesterday noon, I ask her out. Haven't heard from her since then. I'm probably overinvesting, right? She probably just wanted to schmang. I should probably try to relax. I feel like a headless chicken.

1. Some people are incredibly good at actually living life and not responding to every text they get, sometimes for hours or days. Just leave it.

2. Asking out by text is generally a mistake. Everything important, ever, in a relationship, has to happen face to face. It's about the real genuine connection.

Just drop the conversation entirely and if you see her again, chat, ask how she's doing, etc.

If you made an impression on her, hopefully she's not averse to it, but your text ask-out probably put her on the back foot.

 

[names2hard4you]

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

Goodness. My man, just ask her out.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Yeah, and "quadrilogy" is a word for idiots, created by a marketing department.

The real word is tetralogy.

I still haven't bought the Alien movies on blu-ray because of this. Fuck you Fox and your catering to syphilitic minds.

And I see you trying to trigger me Ray. Keep it up and I'll come down there and play you like a marionette using your loose skin.

I never asked, but the question was always in the back of my mind, LOL

I wish someone who was like seriously overweight would say to be that their partner is gaining a lot of weight just so I can some insight into what's going through mind that they see how fat their partner is but not themselves.

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

This is literally the wurst idea I've seen in any dating thread and we had Ray writing songs for someone.

I mean, does she know you like her? Does she like you? Have y'all even dated? You have to date and shit before you get the kissing stage.

 

[Wurst]

Okay guys, backstory time.

I've known her since end of 2015. We've been acquainted and friends. She split up with her ex in December... because he didn't want to have kids. We started to see each other more often since then, mainly because we have this uni project together. She started to use tinder back then and she super-liked me. We matched, had a laugh about it. At the same time she asked me out to see a play at the theater with me. I started to develop feelings but I had the impression she used me as a distraction. She whined constantly, how she missed her ex.

We started to see each other more regularly. I started to ask her out on dates (ice skating, made dinner several times, walks, clubbing). Most amazing dates I've ever had. She enjoyed them too, i guess. We did a lot of crazy things together. We cuddle a lot, massage each other, holding hands even. But she never engages in that longer eye contact thing before a kiss. Ever.

She actively contacts me and wants to do stuff. We've seen each other every day the last two weeks now... I'm not a kissing virgin and kissed before, but I just can't engage with her and I don't know why. I'm paralyzed when I'm with her. She just doesn't give me those "I want you" vibes. She's talking about how she kissed random strangers at clubs or how she had kissing orgies with her friends a lot, which makes me fucking rage and also very confused. I feel like the only idiot who just can't manage to kiss her.

TLDR: I've been on 20+ incredible big and small dates with her. We're also friends and work colleagues. She's amazing. I'm more physical with her than with any other romance. Factually, we're a match made in heaven. I just can't seem to find a way to engage her in a kiss.

 

[Leeness]

Congrats! I feel you on "relatively" I've gained like 4-5 in a year and a half.

Yeah, basically. I need to get back into eating better again though so that I can keep everything off.

Dear GAF-man,

I've fallen for this incredible girl. But I'm too much of a coward to kiss her. It's a bit complicated, since this came out of a friendship and we have a project together. She also gives me confusing signals sometimes.

I've been to an all-you-can-eat sushi today, which she couldn't come to and was jealous about. I grabbed a fortune cookie for her and plan to give it to her tomorrow. I got the message out and want to put in a custom one: "Kiss the one who gave you the cookie" or something. Is that romantic or totally embarrassing?

I just don't know anymore :S

No. No. No.

 

[Count Dookkake]

Okay guys, backstory time.

I've known her since end of 2015. We've been acquainted and friends. She split up with her ex in December... because he didn't want to have kids. We started to see each other more often since then, mainly because we have this uni project together. She started to use tinder back then and she super-liked me. We matched, had a laugh about it. At the same time she asked me out to see a play at the theater with me. I started to develop feelings but I had the impression she used me as a distraction. She whined constantly, how she missed her ex.

We started to see each other more regularly. I started to ask her out on dates (ice skating, made dinner several times, walks, clubbing). Most amazing dates I've ever had. She enjoyed them too, i guess. We did a lot of crazy things together. We cuddle a lot, massage each other, holding hands even. But she never engages in that longer eye contact thing before a kiss. Ever.

She actively contacts me and wants to do stuff. We've seen each other every day the last two weeks now... I'm not a kissing virgin and kissed before, but I just can't engage with her and I don't know why. I'm paralyzed when I'm with her. She just doesn't give me those "I want you" vibes. She's talking about how she kissed random strangers at clubs or how she had kissing orgies with her friends a lot, which makes me fucking rage and also very confused. I feel like the only idiot who just can't manage to kiss her.

TLDR: I've been on 20+ incredible big and small dates with her. We're also friends and work colleagues. She's amazing. I'm more physical with her than with any other romance. Factually, we're a match made in heaven. I just can't seem to find a way to engage her in a kiss.

You're about 5 minutes away from losing her to someone she just met.