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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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E

Earthbound64

Banned
Salamando said:
Uhhh, how long today were you texting/talking? Have you gone on a date yet, or at least set up a meet?
Click to expand...

Well, I had an appointment, and had to go out and do some errands. So there was a gap from like 12:30-3:30 (or somewhere around there)
Otherwise, from like 11-9:15

Haven't been on a date yet. She was thinking of coming up here this weekend, but I don't know.
 
L

Lemon Crest

Member
Alright dating gaf, I have lurked this thread for years. Time to throw my stuff into the mix.

I ended a year and half long relationship this past march due to me realizing I had been ignoring myself both physically and mentally for a while. I had gained around 30 pounds and I wasn't challenging myself anymore. It was extremely difficult to end it because I really did love my ex-gf and I do still miss my her ,but I know it was ultimately the right move.

To remedy my self-neglect, I've been going to therapy and been discussing/working on my issues which has been extremely helpful. in addition, I've started cooking more at home and jogging a couple times week which has made me lose the extra weight . I even ran in my first 5k 2 weeks ago and didn't die while doing it

As for my dating life post breakup, I made out with my one of buddies roommates and I had a quick fling with a girl in one of my classes. We had one great date which lead to us hooking up and then one god awful one that put the fling on ice. Not complaining tho, the experience was fun even the bad date plus I'm not exactly itching to be back into a relationship.

Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
 
Ray Wonder

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Lemon Crest said:
Alright dating gaf, I have lurked this thread for years. Time to throw my stuff into the mix.

I ended a year and half long relationship this past march due to me realizing I had been ignoring myself both physically and mentally for a while. I had gained around 30 pounds and I wasn't changeling myself anymore. It was extremely difficult to end it because I really did love my ex-gf and I do still miss my her ,but I know it was ultimately the right move.

To remedy my self-neglect, I've been going to therapy and been discussing/working on my issues which has been extremely helpful. in addition, I've started cooking more at home and jogging a couple times week which has made me lose the extra weight . I even ran in my first 5k 2 weeks ago and didn't die while doing it

As for my dating life post breakup, I made out with my one of buddies roommates and I had a quick fling with a girl in one of my classes. We had one great date which lead to us hooking up and then one god awful one that put the fling on ice. Not complaining tho, the experience was fun even the bad date plus I'm not exactly itching to be back into a relationship.

Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
Click to expand...

I've seen Donald Trump sized walls of text for girls that they haven't even went on a date with before. You're fine lol. Also, Idk what you're wanting to hear? About this girl on Tinder? I'd wait until she messages you. And not really think about it much. Go find a few more people on Tinder to talk to.
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
Lemon Crest said:
Alright dating gaf, I have lurked this thread for years. Time to throw my stuff into the mix.

I ended a year and half long relationship this past march due to me realizing I had been ignoring myself both physically and mentally for a while. I had gained around 30 pounds and I wasn't challenging myself anymore. It was extremely difficult to end it because I really did love my ex-gf and I do still miss my her ,but I know it was ultimately the right move.

To remedy my self-neglect, I've been going to therapy and been discussing/working on my issues which has been extremely helpful. in addition, I've started cooking more at home and jogging a couple times week which has made me lose the extra weight . I even ran in my first 5k 2 weeks ago and didn't die while doing it

As for my dating life post breakup, I made out with my one of buddies roommates and I had a quick fling with a girl in one of my classes. We had one great date which lead to us hooking up and then one god awful one that put the fling on ice. Not complaining tho, the experience was fun even the bad date plus I'm not exactly itching to be back into a relationship.

Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
Click to expand...

Sounds like you're doing everything right and have a good attitude. Keep going!
 
S

Salamando

Member
Ray Wonder said:
I got so much time to myself idk even what to do with my arms, I just realized they exist again
Click to expand...
Pushups, curls, and presses.
Earthbound64 said:
Well, I had an appointment, and had to go out and do some errands. So there was a gap from like 12:30-3:30 (or somewhere around there)
Otherwise, from like 11-9:15

Haven't been on a date yet. She was thinking of coming up here this weekend, but I don't know.
Click to expand...
That's a long time. Too long. You shouldn't put off plans or not do something because of text messaging...and if you spent 7 hours texting, something else had to have suffered.
Lemon Crest said:
Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
Click to expand...
You're good, and you're in a good place with Tinder girl. Sending one more message won't hurt anything, and you can easily segue that into a "Want to show off your new place?"
 
E

Earthbound64

Banned
Salamando said:
That's a long time. Too long. You shouldn't put off plans or not do something because of text messaging...and if you spent 7 hours texting, something else had to have suffered.
Click to expand...

To be fair, I was messaging from a computer, while doing other stuff.
To heck with squinting at a phone for all that time - I'm too old for that.
 
Ray Wonder

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Earthbound64 said:
To be fair, I was messaging from a computer, while doing other stuff.
To heck with squinting at a phone for all that time - I'm too old for that.
Click to expand...

Took me about 15 messages, her's included, for me to have a date this weekend. Sometimes less is more.

Although I am an advocate of texting. Elaborating on what you text about, during a date, is easy conversation that ends up pretty damn fun.

EDIT: Drop a "I'll tell you on our first date" type line, while texting.
 
E

Earthbound64

Banned
Ray Wonder said:
Took me about 15 messages, her's included, for me to have a date this weekend. Sometimes less is more.

Although I am an advocate of texting. Elaborating on what you text about, during a date, is easy conversation that ends up pretty damn fun.

EDIT: Drop a "I'll tell you on our first date" type line, while texting.
Click to expand...

Oh, this isn't planning for a date or anything. Just chatting.
I'm not even positive I want a date, given things.
 
L

Lemon Crest

Member
Ray Wonder said:
I've seen Donald Trump sized walls of text for girls that they haven't even went on a date with before. You're fine lol. Also, Idk what you're wanting to hear? About this girl on Tinder? I'd wait until she messages you. And not really think about it much. Go find a few more people on Tinder to talk to.
Click to expand...
Duly noted. I got a couple of active matches so I'll see how it goes with any of them.
always crazy bacon said:
Sounds like you're doing everything right and have a good attitude. Keep going!
Click to expand...
Thanks man!
Salamando said:
You're good, and you're in a good place with Tinder girl. Sending one more message won't hurt anything, and you can easily segue that into a "Want to show off your new place?"
Click to expand...

Alright, I'll send her a message tomorrow.
 
A

always crazy bacon

Banned
Earthbound64 said:
Well, I'm not positive that I don't want to date her either.
The situation seems to be what I'm looking for - someone who's loving and caring and attentive - and I feel like I shouldn't just pass that off.
Click to expand...

I think you're projecting onto a potentially infatuated with an older man 21YO girl that you are enabling. What's she doing that's so loving and caring? Attentive or likes the attention? As has been chronicled many times already in this topic.
 
A

Advocatus Diaboli

Member
Earthbound64 said:
Well, I'm not positive that I don't want to date her either.
The situation seems to be what I'm looking for - someone who's loving and caring and attentive - and I feel like I shouldn't just pass that off.
Click to expand...

If it's not what you're looking for, why did you PM Leeness asking her thoughts on taking this girl's supposed virginity?

You're going to fuck her (and in your heart of hearts you know you're going to fuck her) and it's probably not going to work out, but let's fast forward to that point.
 
S

Salamando

Member
Advocatus Diaboli said:
If it's not what you're looking for, why did you PM Leeness asking her thoughts on taking this girl's supposed virginity?
Click to expand...

...that's a turn of events I was not expecting. Saw an AD post, thought it'd have some divorcee wisdom. "Divorces are confusing and emotional, but this girl is simple. You know she wants you, so you find comfort in that and want her". But no.

Count Dookkake said:
Take her virginity. You'll be doing her a favor. She may have picked you because she thinks you'll be nice about it.
Click to expand...

I kinda want him to, to see how bad this can get. Girl already wants to move in with him. If they have sex, she'll likely propose.
 
M

Megalosaro

Banned
I think I managed to turn things around.

Dinner was nice. The food was great and she really liked it. We watched some of the Spurs game. She's a pretty big sports fan, but she tries to hide it. It's cute.

She wasn't too pissy about it me not picking her up. I think I was over thinking that.

She was actually pretty chill and in a cheery mood.

I fucking sucked at dancing lol. But I knew I would. All you can do is own it though.
 
C

combine42

Neo Member
Lemon Crest said:
Alright dating gaf, I have lurked this thread for years. Time to throw my stuff into the mix.

I ended a year and half long relationship this past march due to me realizing I had been ignoring myself both physically and mentally for a while. I had gained around 30 pounds and I wasn't challenging myself anymore. It was extremely difficult to end it because I really did love my ex-gf and I do still miss my her ,but I know it was ultimately the right move.

To remedy my self-neglect, I've been going to therapy and been discussing/working on my issues which has been extremely helpful. in addition, I've started cooking more at home and jogging a couple times week which has made me lose the extra weight . I even ran in my first 5k 2 weeks ago and didn't die while doing it

As for my dating life post breakup, I made out with my one of buddies roommates and I had a quick fling with a girl in one of my classes. We had one great date which lead to us hooking up and then one god awful one that put the fling on ice. Not complaining tho, the experience was fun even the bad date plus I'm not exactly itching to be back into a relationship.

Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
Click to expand...
I'm a little confused here. You broke up with your SO because you let yourself go. So what happens in the next relationship you get into that lasts over a year?
 
artsi

artsi

Member
Ok so I've now arranged 5 dates, one is done (second date is happening) and another one is today.

There's two older women who I kind of just want to try, and then three girls my own age (or younger) that I have more in common with, and might be relationship material.

Then there's more girls I've been talking to but I know I should just stop booking dates right now because juggling these is getting crazy.
 
M

Miles Quaritch

Member
The old I'm a virgin spiel huh. There's as much chance she's a virgin as there is for Count's or Zackie's hair to grow back. Basically nil.

As for why she's so interested in you to the point where she's waited two years for something to possibly happen? Deep-seated daddy issues or she just wants to smash someone older so she can cross it off her bucket list.

The whole thing sounds exhausting and your passiveness is annoying, what should I do, I don't know, yadda, yadda, yadda. How about you just decide, you're 30+ years old and you're acting like a teen who doesn't know what they want.

I get it, recently divorced and you're struggling, but that's no reason to regress to the point where you're unable to make decisions about your future relationships.
 
M

Miles Quaritch

Member
velociraptor said:
How do I handle someone who is being irritable and frankly all out weird due to 'Premenstrual Syndrome'.

I told her 'let's be honest, you're in control of your mind, thoughts and actions. Your body does not control you'.

She claims I don't know anything.

I personally hate it when people blame their behaviour on psychological issues which have been souped up. Frankly, if you THINK you have a problem, then you WILL have a problem.
Click to expand...

Well you sure your ass here and fucked it up. What did you think would happen when you told her to take control of her mind?

Oh I hadn't thought of that, let me just use my brain to stop my period and all associated hormonal releases that go along with it. Ahhhh, much better...I can't believe I didn't think of that. Thank you for helping me to overcome this frustrating problem I face every month.

I'd seriously advise you actually look into things like this in future and not dismiss real issues out of hand with ridiculous mind over matter garbage, that's if you're interested in having relationships that last more than 3 weeks.
 
L

Lemon Crest

Member
combine42 said:
I'm a little confused here. You broke up with your SO because you let yourself go. So what happens in the next relationship you get into that lasts over a year?
Click to expand...

It was a key part of it. I mean there's other more personal factors that lead me to my decision, but I'd rather not mention them on here.


As to your second point. I don't know? Hopefully,by being more careful and proactive, I can catch myself before it happens again.
 
S

Salamando

Member
Oblivion said:
Question: dating someone in an open relationship.

Yay or nay?
Click to expand...

Depends entirely on you. Are you capable of sharing a girlfriend? Are you looking for the same thing out of a relationship that they are?

Lemon Crest said:
As to your second point. I don't know? Hopefully,by being more careful and proactive, I can catch myself before it happens again.
Click to expand...
You're going to therapy - use it to it's fullest potential. A therapist legally can't disclose what you talk about, unless you pose a risk to yourself or others. Be honest and encourage them to call you out on your bullshit.
 
M

Messofanego

Banned
Makonero said:
or they're a vampire

ZAl19Pe.gif
Click to expand...

Love this movie XD
 
M

Messofanego

Banned
Lemon Crest said:
Alright dating gaf, I have lurked this thread for years. Time to throw my stuff into the mix.

I ended a year and half long relationship this past march due to me realizing I had been ignoring myself both physically and mentally for a while. I had gained around 30 pounds and I wasn't challenging myself anymore. It was extremely difficult to end it because I really did love my ex-gf and I do still miss my her ,but I know it was ultimately the right move.

To remedy my self-neglect, I've been going to therapy and been discussing/working on my issues which has been extremely helpful. in addition, I've started cooking more at home and jogging a couple times week which has made me lose the extra weight . I even ran in my first 5k 2 weeks ago and didn't die while doing it

As for my dating life post breakup, I made out with my one of buddies roommates and I had a quick fling with a girl in one of my classes. We had one great date which lead to us hooking up and then one god awful one that put the fling on ice. Not complaining tho, the experience was fun even the bad date plus I'm not exactly itching to be back into a relationship.

Also been goofing around on Tinder and got a girls number. Tried setting up a date with her. she said she's interested but is moving to a new place this week so it's not the greatest time. I told her to get back to me when she's free and that's where I'm leaving that. Might message her in a week if I hear nothing, but if nothing happens after that, I'm deleting her number and moving on.

so yeah that's where I am at right now. Sorry for the wall of text.
Click to expand...

Respect on the physical goals, and your dating life. Keep it up!
 
G

Gotdatmoney

Member
Earthbound64 said:
Sorry.
Click to expand...

I would just add that you have been doing this passive "I dunno what I want but", "she really likes me and I don't wanna let it pass without trying", "blah blah blah I'm a sweet guy" thing and like no one is buying it. You can lie to us but we've read enough stories and had enough experiences here that I am confident in saying no one actually believes what you are saying.

You just want to pull this girl because she is interested in you (and I use interest loosely here) and you want to have that feeling that after your last relationship you can still pull the young hot girl. That's fine, if all you want to do is have sex with her you can totally do that and we totally are not going to care or deem it as some horrid sin. But the way you are framing it as something deeper than it actually is is annoying.

You, me, the rest of the thread, Santa Clause and Jesus all know you and this girl don't have a fucking future together. We all know this is bad news if you indulge in it. We all know you are going to indulge in it anyway because logic be damned in some cases. So maybe lets just skip all this fronting?

Maybe I am being a dick but it's way more admirable when someone says, "frankly I judt want sex and an ego boost" then when they pretend there is some deep level of emotional and mental that is guiding them.
 
M

Messofanego

Banned
Advocatus Diaboli said:
If it's not what you're looking for, why did you PM Leeness asking her thoughts on taking this girl's supposed virginity?

You're going to fuck her (and in your heart of hearts you know you're going to fuck her) and it's probably not going to work out, but let's fast forward to that point.
Click to expand...

Oh boy.
Miles Quaritch said:
The old I'm a virgin spiel huh. There's as much chance she's a virgin as there is for Count's or Zackie's hair to grow back. Basically nil.
Click to expand...
pinnochio.gif
 
Ray Wonder

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
As long as she knows you just wanna fuck, but if you hit it and dip you're technically a fuckboi.

Miles Quaritch said:
The old I'm a virgin spiel huh. There's as much chance she's a virgin as there is for Count's or Zackie's hair to grow back. Basically nil.
Click to expand...

Ew shit 🔥🔮
 
Ray Wonder

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
I need to go back and read the whole thing, he's talking about moving in with her and they haven't met?
 
A

Ataxia

Member
More advice than anything. I was talking to a girl yesterday and she made a joke about me breaking up with my girlfriend. My girlfriend asked me what we were talking about and I shared the joke and then my girlfriend got upset and stopped talking to me

She sent me a message today asking me to forgive her for overreacting but I don't even know. The whole situation just seems weird. Because of this I haven't spoken to her in an entire day now. She sent that message 13 hours ago and I've just

It really caught me off guard. Am I overthinking this thing? I should probably just accept the apology and apologise myself?
 
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