always crazy bacon
Banned
"if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best" bullshit right there.
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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
- Start date
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Benzychenz
Member
Just wanted to pop in and say I met a chick off tinder for brunch this morning.
Ending up staying and chatting for nearly 2 hours, and a goodbye hug.
Gonna message her tonight to say I had a great time, then from there see when she's free for a second date.
Thinking bowling? Or just take the dog down to the river or something (but it's winter here now so eh on that one).
Ending up staying and chatting for nearly 2 hours, and a goodbye hug.
Gonna message her tonight to say I had a great time, then from there see when she's free for a second date.
Thinking bowling? Or just take the dog down to the river or something (but it's winter here now so eh on that one).
always crazy bacon
Banned
Congrats on the hug.
Subpar Scrub
Banned
Miles Quaritch
Member
The reddest of red flags. Whoever says this usually has some serious issues and you'll have to hang around a long, long time to see their 'best', which is often only normal for most people...
Benzychenz
Member
😂
Hello/goodbye hugs come as standard for me.
Thanks for the suggestion!
I'll give it a read.Have you ever read Bukowski? Check out this book:
You'll feel like less of a cunt. It's also just an extremely good book that every man should read. It will toughen you up, even if you're already a tough son of a bitch.
Thanks for the suggestion!
Benzychenz
Member
Miles Quaritch
Member
Well, how long was the hug?
Did you position one of your hands at her lower back and pull her in? Did you smell her hair? Rub her cheek wirh yours?
We need details.
Did you position one of your hands at her lower back and pull her in? Did you smell her hair? Rub her cheek wirh yours?
We need details.
Prime crotch
Banned
Well, another date who just became an acquaintance, I'm kinda tired of having to be the one with all the initiative when it comes to meeting and proposing stuff. I'm in a town with a lot of single guys, so I got that going against me, but sheeeeeeeeesh.
But usually when people write that is more on about how they see themselves as too wild and excusing their shitty behavior.
There's some truth to it though, but in a different context as to what people mean it when they write it on dating profiles. If your companion can't support you when you're down under then yeaaaah, probably that person isn't right for you.
But usually when people write that is more on about how they see themselves as too wild and excusing their shitty behavior.
Benzychenz
Member
Alright we're both free Friday night so that's our second date.
What to suggest? Bowling, drinks, show her how far gaming has come since SMB?
What to suggest? Bowling, drinks, show her how far gaming has come since SMB?
Juke Joint Jezebel
Member
Well, I wouldn't go that far, but it's always fascinating to see what dude's are packing downstairs. I've seen fairly small and unimpressive dicks, dicks that quite frankly make my insides hurt just thinking about them, and everything in between! And all are amusing and interesting to look at. Hell, some of them are even arousing from time to time. I'm into them cock shots big time!
I decided to commit to my girl and give up being single. Someone here posted that I never gave my relationship with her a fair chance, and I realized that person was right.
It's just a relationship. If things don't work out then we will break up. But I should at least give it a shot and delete the dating apps and see how it feels.... having a girlfriend at this age is scary but also kind of exciting. And I'm not as "trapped" feeling as I originally feared I would be.
I'm going to miss going out with new girls, but what good is endless freedom if you don't make any commitments with that freedom? That freedom is meaningless if you make no choices with it. And I have now made my choice. I came close to breaking up with her, but I'm glad she waited it out and never pushed me into this. I needed the time to think about what is important. And the way she treats me is always what I've ever wanted out of a partner.
Thanks everyone for putting up with my back and forth verbal diarrhea over the last few weeks. Ultimately, I'm glad I started reading/posting here.
It's just a relationship. If things don't work out then we will break up. But I should at least give it a shot and delete the dating apps and see how it feels.... having a girlfriend at this age is scary but also kind of exciting. And I'm not as "trapped" feeling as I originally feared I would be.
I'm going to miss going out with new girls, but what good is endless freedom if you don't make any commitments with that freedom? That freedom is meaningless if you make no choices with it. And I have now made my choice. I came close to breaking up with her, but I'm glad she waited it out and never pushed me into this. I needed the time to think about what is important. And the way she treats me is always what I've ever wanted out of a partner.
Thanks everyone for putting up with my back and forth verbal diarrhea over the last few weeks. Ultimately, I'm glad I started reading/posting here.
So a girl on OkC messaged me again, and I'm waffling on continuing. I saw her profile before and it seemed nice but wrote it off because she's a really worldly traveller, apparently really drug friendly, and might have dogs, which are all things I find hard to relate to.
She said I was funny but admitted she only read the first few lines of my profile, so I feel like stepping on landmines. I just want to meet someone I can casually mention video games with and not be paranoid of silent judgement, haha. Finding it hard to relate to her profile just makes me feel guilty that I should be out doing more things before trying to date.
Somehow the conversation is still going but I'm waffling at pushing for a number and date, I feel like it'd be really awkward. Not sure if I'm wasting time or being self-defeating.
She said I was funny but admitted she only read the first few lines of my profile, so I feel like stepping on landmines. I just want to meet someone I can casually mention video games with and not be paranoid of silent judgement, haha. Finding it hard to relate to her profile just makes me feel guilty that I should be out doing more things before trying to date.
Somehow the conversation is still going but I'm waffling at pushing for a number and date, I feel like it'd be really awkward. Not sure if I'm wasting time or being self-defeating.
You won't know how well you get on with someone until you meet them.
Give her your number and arrange a date.
always crazy bacon
Banned
Have you been told to read this topic title yet?
Yeah, I'll go through with it, but it does feel like pushing myself along, not so natural. I need the dating experience though.
I did actually think of that haha, I knew that was probably gonna be the advice.
Oh shit anybody remember that thread from the English dude who cought his Jersey Shore type GF looking at dick pics? Jesus Christ that thread almost killed me
That was the one with "fancy looking at more dicks?" or something like that, right? I think that was a thread where he actually took advice and got her out of his life like right away and kept proof for when she tried to lie about it too. It was a pretty good thread.
TMI
That's a lot of money compared to what I imagine a lot of people have to spend on dates
yay happy ending!
Gotdatmoney
Member
Holy shit you actually did it. I didn't expect it, thanks for listening to reason.
I mean congrats haha
Welp and just like that, another member of NYC's most eligible nerdy bachelors is off the market. I have a feeling we'll be seeing this mystery girl at a future GAF meet up.;p Do pop into the NYC GAF Discord chat BTW!
That being said, your whole saga with this girl and trying to have your cake and eat reminded me of this:
The Scott Pilgrim series is worth checking out FYI if you haven't read it because it delves into relationships, trust, and all that jazz.
I wanted to add that my older brother (who's your age BTW) is married to someone who my mom and oldest brother don't like her very much at all as a person. We don't know what he saw in her but in the end of the day for better or worse she's part of the family especially because I have two nieces. He's happy I suppose so more power to him because they're quite similar in the end of the day. All the best moving forward with this relationship.
As for my latest update in cynical online dating adventures, last night I went to see an award ceremony with a 29 year old grad student from OKC yesterday because I had free tickets. We had a few drinks at a nearby bar beforehand and the chemistry was great with lots of laughs and jokes from both sides. There's a je ne sais quoi about dating California girls that gels well with New Yorkers (she's originally from SF); I have two more California girls on my plate to date. At one point, I mistakenly made a reference to another girl which was awkward but I played it off nicely and was being my charming self.
I held her hand during the screening because I noticed that she kept fiddling with her hair and kept it there for a while. I introduced her to one of my good friends who was at the screening afterwards because I told her about how him and I were working the graduation gigs as well today's volunteering gig that we're doing. Afterwards he jokingly texted me to invite him to the wedding.
It turns out that she lives about ten blocks away from my way and a few avenues over but is moving to another part of the city next month. She had to dip afterwards because she was going to meet up with someone else. I asked her out again so fingers crossed that I get a second date because I haven't had any luck getting second dates this year at all. Regardless of the outcome, I have a bunch more dates in the pipeline and have been chatting with a few others.
I can relate, but my advice is to absolutely push for a date. Getting more dating experience under your belt is never a waste of time, and getting out of your comfort zone is a nice bonus. Even if it's a bad date, you will have learned something from it.
I agree with this. As long as they live near-ish and there's not a lot of commute time, almost any date is worth just a quick hour-long coffee meeting, at least at first. You'll learn a lot about yourself and how you date and what you want, and can often can good social ideas for dates/meetings/activities, etc.
I've not hit it off with anyone really since moving into the city, but I've learned a lot and got a lot more relaxed and experienced, and my conversion rate to 2nd/3rd dates has gone up greatly over the last year.
Plus if you haven't been getting some on the regular, there's always the prospect of hooking up.
I wouldn't push for this quite so hard. If you're not feeling it, don't do it. There will be other girls.
But I have almost cancelled on so many 1st dates that I'm glad I didn't cancel on, and have also looked forward to so many 1st dates that ended up being duds. You really can't tell whether you're going to click until you're in a room together. But I wouldn't go so far as to say there's something to learn from every date. Sometimes you get there and just want to leave because she's horrifying.
The Power Of Snap
Member
Wise stuff from the hodgetwins https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8sGv3pcHs0
Their videos on relationship problems are gold. I can spend an entire evening just cycling through them.
artsi
Member
Yeah they're damn hilarious lol.
Messofanego
Banned
When a girl is upfront about being a "psychotic ex bitch", don't be surprised if I distance myself away from them slowly and surely haha. She'd constantly be hot and cold. At first, I thought this honesty must show she's aware of herself and probably isn't that bad as she makes it out to be. Probably some self-loathing going on. But then (despite my profession), I'm not here to sort her out. When I hinted we should meet up and then she said no and laughed, I just ended it there. Waste of time. I don't care whether if she was hurt in the past so she puts up these walls and pushes people away as an explanation, I'm not here for mind games. If her goal was to push me away, that worked really well so I stopped talking to her or texting her for two weeks. Much better girls out there to chat to.
Megalosaro
Banned
Great. Bravo
What happened? That's a little worrisome, wasn't he a bit depressed?
Don't know, he asked the mods to nuke his whole account very suddenly. Username and all. I've heard rumors from, er, sources, but I don't know anything for sure.
I'm sure Chewie himself is fine.
I dunno if hooking up is really something I'm looking for right now. Considering I've had nearly zero 1st dates recently, your advice makes sense but might not apply to me since I've never even really had the horrifying experiences, heh.
Anyway, she's texting up a storm with me and pretty much exhausting her life story, I think she's my therapist now. I can't bring myself to bite the bullet so this is probably going nowhere but being a texting buddy haha. Sorry guys!
It's real, I love first dates for that very reason. That's why I can't be fair and commit to someone. I just like dating specifically, meeting someone new. I uninstalled my apps because I can't date atm, but I reinstalled Bumble because I like getting matches. Uninstalled again tho, let's see how long I last.
So I've gone out with 3 girls since I first posted here, but nothing remarkable so far. The one that was the most promising (I went on 3 dates with her) I felt on our last date that she started losing interest on me so I moved on.
I've got a fair share of matches on Tinder but most of them the moment I ask them on a date (after exchanging some messages) they won't reply, say that it is too soon to meet up or unmatch me. Although lately the matches have gone down, I have to admit that my profile can be improved, as the photos that I put are taken with a cellphone and don't show too much of my interests, so I asked a friend of mine to take some photos with his camera this weekend. Hopefully after I reset my account, the situation improves.
I've got a fair share of matches on Tinder but most of them the moment I ask them on a date (after exchanging some messages) they won't reply, say that it is too soon to meet up or unmatch me. Although lately the matches have gone down, I have to admit that my profile can be improved, as the photos that I put are taken with a cellphone and don't show too much of my interests, so I asked a friend of mine to take some photos with his camera this weekend. Hopefully after I reset my account, the situation improves.
Ahhhhh man D:
I'm kind of worried, hope he's doing well and improving.
It's absolutely true. I've been busy as hell for the girls I'm already dating yet I find myself on the apps daily. I actually think to myself every time "what am I even doing on here?" I'm sure there's been multiple books already written on the psychology of online dating and how the "gamification" is detrimental to garnering meaningful relationships but hey!
jimmypython
Member
yeah resetting would help for sure.
On my end, turns out I was ghosted by some girl before the day we were supposed to meet. She had been sending me all the selfies in sexy outfits and was asking me what to wear on the date for fuck sakes. feels pretty bad...oh well.......lol
always crazy bacon
Banned
I'm sure a lot of people here that get matches and the girls don't reply to messages and question why is because of the same reason. They want matches for validation.
Once again, no chemistry felt but I don't care anymore. My cynicism was right to not give a hoot. I keep moving on. Women my age just don't like guys who still live with family but when you have a guy who doesn't want to settle down yet, it creates conflict. There's nothing wrong with me but I can only learn from body language to tell me if a person is or isn't into me. No strategizing here, only being me.
always crazy bacon
Banned
That's a very wide brush you've painted there. What are the details of the situation, can you even see it from your dates POV?
Subpar Scrub
Banned
How old are you?
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